Cooking like Pozniak

When a male has finished the job, pulls out and ejaculates all over his partners face, but before he’s done, he pulls out some chest hair and garnishes his leftovers in a salt bae manner.

I walked in on my flat mate last night, he was with a bird. He must have been conkers deep with her as he was “Cooking like Pozniak” when I caught them.

by VinceVegas January 24, 2020

Cooking From Scratch

When the last thing you did before food prep was scratch your nuts furiously.

He brags about cooking from scratch but I wonder what he scratched.

by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020

A Penguin That Prefers His Fish Cooked Waddles On A Slippery Slope

The translation of a Swedish proverb to mean not to dwell on things that cannot be

Jack: So I've been putting a lot of thought into it and I think Jessica and I would make a great couple!

George: Come on Jack, remember what dad always told us: "A Penguin That Prefers His Fish Cooked Waddles On A Slippery Slope." You know you have no chance with Jessica, stop obsessing over it.

by Zoom_Zolomon March 28, 2020

You know, like Cook

When you’re about to have intercourse but change your mind mid way through and the other person is completely cool about it because they understand the concept of consent

- We were about to do it but I changed my mind and they were ok with it; you know, like Cook

-From skins?
-Yeah, him

by YourStepSister April 2, 2020

pressure cooked

Pressure cooked: Insanely high, like beyond steamed.

That is some crazy weed dude, I'm fucking pressure cooked!

by ChrisFSB April 24, 2020

Cook machine

A concept designed by Issy (a mix between a washing machine and a oven)

Turn the cook machine on

by Big brain bill April 25, 2020

Cook machine

A cook machine is a way to use less space having a cooker and a washing machine in 1

The other day I brought a cook machine to use less space

by Cookmachine123 April 25, 2020