raped by jesus

when jesus comes down with spider people and rapes your grandma in the ass true fact if you commit too satan prepare the aking

i felt jesus in my ass i think i was raped by jesus

by dic kin ya momma bith April 20, 2017

jesus hong

The Asian version of Jesus Christ, from family guy

You know, I met Jesus in there, he is Chinese, and his last name is Hong, he has no idea where people got the Christ thing from. (Jesus Hong)

by ChubbyUnicorn July 13, 2017

banana jesus

the god of fun and fruit and has never turns down a good time with freinds and hot chicks.

damn, banana jesus gots the moves!!

by bananajesus2018 September 21, 2017

rave jesus

An individual who dresses up as jesus and attends raves. Goes up to individuals having a bad reaction or "trip" on drugs and makes them feel safe.

Friend one: Damn bro, I was so mucked out last night! I saw god!
Friend two: Na dude, that was rave jesus.

by jghfcjvkhjkk January 27, 2019

Jesus Crackers

Communion bread. Only funnier and truer. Best used in the context of satirizing Christianity and in humoring the physical appearance of the bread.

Friend: "I went to church today"
Friend 2: "Ouu what'd you do?"
Friend: "We heard a homily and prayed and received communion!"
Friend 2: "yOu mEan yOu aTe jEsuS cRackErs"

by the Dan Dan that Can Can April 13, 2020

Trap Jesus

Is a man who deals in the trap life, but hold to higher morals and standards.

Trap Jesus said he ain't smoking dope with anyone under 23, because they need to get out the traphouse and go to college.

by †π∆₱ J౿§u$ April 17, 2017

Jesus Boner

When your mans boner is so long that it is considered holy.

Lemme see your sweet Jesus Boner

by Cuntmuffin995 September 5, 2019