Shuffle The Tool Cards 

Phrase meaning someone is being a tool and needs to stop doing so.

Guy One-Man, Mike is such a terd.
Guy Two-Yeah, he really needs to shuffle the tool cards.

Shuffle The Tool Cards by ~meatsandwich~ October 23, 2009

Don’t be a fool wrap your tool! 

When the guy your hooking up with won’t use a condom or when your boyfriend wants to get you preggers, but you’re not ready for snotty nosed kids.

I think he wanted to get me pregnant! I only wanted his dick not his kid.. so I said “don’t be a fool wrap your tool!”

Don’t be a fool wrap your tool! by Berthabear3000 May 24, 2019

bag your tool 

wear a condom.

Be kool bag your tool.

bag your tool by daman October 27, 2003

bush-tool 

1) A tool of George W. Bush.
2) A person who unquestionably follows or supports George W. Bush.
3) A person who exhibits Bush-like qualities and/or mannerisms.

Mitt Romney is a bush-tool.

bush-tool by Billyfab January 7, 2007

corporate tool 

Someone who works for THE MAN.

A cog in the corporate machine.

Someone whose net worth is slightly above that of office machine.

An employee known more readily to the corporate decision-makers by his or her employee number rather than by name.

A college-educated employee who makes the same wages as that gum-chewing, fingernail-painting, web-surfing, GED-holding front-desk worker downstairs.

Someone whose job task involves suppressing any creative or thoughtful contribution and merely inputting the data required by THE MAN and outputting the results they expect.

See also whipping boy

“I had to go meet our often-disgruntled and potentially belligerent customers wearing a black t-shirt that reads in bold, white type: “How Are We Doing?” along with our customer comment phone number. I am such a corporate tool.”

corporate tool by THX 1138 February 12, 2004

Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me i aint the sharpest tool in the shed she was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape on an l on her forehead.

The first song of the verse "All Star" by "Shrek: The Movie"

Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me i aint the sharpest tool in the shed she was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape on an l on her forehead.
ORly bro

Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me i aint the sharpest tool in the shed she was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape on an l on her forehead. by Frauggu March 10, 2017

Clown Tool 

A complete and utter idiot

That guy is a right fucking clown tool

Clown Tool by Lenny.Banter July 28, 2008