Spam

Weird ham

Factory worker 1: This ham is in no way different from other pieces of ham
Factory worker 2: I think it's weird so it's spam now.

by udontknowmeidontknowu May 14, 2021

spam/telemarketer defense

Refers to a person's using the well-known prevalence of widespread fake/mass-advertising correspondence as an excuse for his not obeying/acknowledging a 100%-legitimate-but-unwelcome message he has received, such as a hefty bill, restraining order, or other upsetting/disappointing directive that he does not wish to comply with ("Well, it made no sense to me, so I honestly believed it was just a fake message, and simply shrugged it off"). The effectiveness and/or defense-worthiness of said practice --- and your chances of being let off the hook as a result --- can sometimes be further bolstered by "pre-innocentizing" yourself (such as frequently showing up in court for no reason and claiming every time that you'd received an order to appear, and then finally --- after being irritably told for the umpteenth time by the court-clerk that they'd never sent you a summons --- declaring in a frustrated huff, "Fine... well, I guess somebody's been playing sick jokes on me, so from now on I'm just gonna simply IGNORE any and all such notices I receive!") sometime before committing whatever infractions would likely result in said unwelcome orders, so that you can appear justified in your non-compliance with what you supposedly thought was yet another fake order.

I successfully used the spam/telemarketer defense when asked why I hadn't answered a court-summons; I just said, "Oh, that notice was REAL? Oh my --- well, I'd honestly believed it was a fake message... since I've had so many pushy telemarketers and con-men harass me --- sometimes even falsely claiming to be tax-auditors or law-enforcement personnel --- that I'd long ago adopted an 'ignore any and all such notices as fake' policy."

by QuacksO August 9, 2018

spamming

where you just press random keys repetitively

they wouldn't stop spamming keys

by iiiiimmmmmmbbbooorrreeeedddddd September 3, 2025

Spam Tickler

One who flirts on the dance floor, paticularly the slower dances with suitable rubbing

Man, that last dance she was a real spam tickler

by TenFoot October 19, 2009

spam or sperm

Describes da useless content of most of da junk e-mail messages dat land in yer inbox --- i.e., they're either worthless meaningless crap, or sexually-explicit garbage dat you have no interest in.

It was a total waste of time to even check my e-mail inbox today... everything there was either spam or sperm!

by QuacksO October 31, 2018

Spam

A brand of canned meat that became a word for "too much shit in your email feed" and "putting or doing too much of a certain thing" after being used in a Monty Python sketch

Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam...

Vikings: (starting to chant) Spam spam spam spam...

Waitress: ...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam...

Vikings: (singing) Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!

Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor au Crevettes with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.

by Mr. Something-something-idk June 1, 2021

The Spam Ripper

Phrase coined by local media in Renfrewshire to describe the as yet unsolved sex crimes against young men in the ‘Spam Valley’ area of Foxbar, Paisley. It is believed the spam ripper is responsible for the clandestine bumming of 19
Men, several of whom say he never called them afterwards.

Hey! Have you ever noticed that Hilly looks identical to the police artists image of the Spam ripper?

by Stegner April 11, 2025