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The Epstein

When you notice that your family has an uncooked salami in the fridge, and you have a hankerin’ for a big piece of meat. You insert said sausage into the vaginal orifice and pleasure yourself. About a week later, when you notice you have an infection, you tell your parents that the sausage they ate for dinner a few nights earlier was in fact the same sausage which you used for your masturbation needs.
Girl 1: Why weren't you at school?

Girl 2: I accidentally gave my family "The Epstein".
by Sammy "Sausage" Swanson March 6, 2009
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epic fail

(After SP goes 7-8 solid innings, and the bullpen immediately blows a 3-4 run or more lead)

-Fuck this shit, I can't stand another second of this epic fail.
by hugh_jazz May 15, 2010
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Related Words

epilepsy

The disease I have that causes seizures and uncontrolled spasms. It prevents you from doing certain things such as driving a motor vehicle.
I lied about why i couldnt get my drivers license when the real reason was I have slight epilepsy and other mental issues.
by Sal Vitaless January 17, 2008
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eporleum

A sport invented in 2003 involving the gonads of the male sex, where he (e.g. the jackass) must reciprocate his balls up and down the rough bark of a tree (pref. maple).
If the man loses (as in, his balls fall off), then he must seek emergency treatment and possibly a sex change.
Once the man went to the woods to eporleate, he never returned to sanity.
by Davo March 26, 2004
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Epigasm

There was so much epicness going on John had an Epigasm all over the place
by Jab0015 March 10, 2008
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Epic Beatdown

When you're beating / winning against your opponent so hard and easily, that it becomes an epic fail for him
Rambo's fight against the russian army in First Blood Part II is an epic beatdown.
by Snusfinder General November 28, 2010
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Epic Face Palm

When something so epic happens, you just can't help but put your palm to your face with your head lowered.
John just told his ex he cheated on her at the party last night. (Epic Face Palm)
by NerdyNelson September 23, 2012
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