Uncle Colon

Uncle Colon is a man who has a detachable colon. Legend has it, that if you call his number (I don’t want to give it out for the safety of the reader), he will appear on your doorstep.

If you invite him in, you’re in for a treat. He will proceed to detach his colon, so that it is hanging freely out of his body. Then he’ll smother ketchup all over it. After that he’ll sprinkle some sesame seeds on it. Now, this is where the fun begins. He will force you to suck all of the ketchup and sesame seeds of his colon.

Once you have sucked it clean, he will wind it up and put his colon where it belongs. He will then pack up his ketcup and sesame seeds and leave. Not before thanking you for your service to him, of course. He keeps it very professional and he is always a polite guest. There are no official documentations of Uncle Colon, but I’m a believer.

Only one question remains: Are you a believer?
Person 1: Dang, I’m really craving some sesame seeds and ketchup right now.
Person 2: Dude, you should just call Uncle Colon and he’ll pay a visit. You needs will be more than fulfilled.
by The Crusty December 16, 2017
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colonizer mentality

colonizer mentality is when , someone says something that sounds like they might invade another beings personal space or take someones personal belongings as theirs
léa - im taking his sweater because since we're dating whats his is also mines or maybe only mines

noah - thats colonizer mentality right there
by noahisamenace April 25, 2021
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colon slug

A person who is far up the ass the management and only comes out to leave a shit trail on the work of everyone.
He's the chief operating officer's colon slug.
by CoffeeSommelier March 14, 2010
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Michael Colon

the weird kid that wears a beanie and hoodie and licks his toilet
Watch out for michael colon he goes in anyone’s bathroom and starts licking their toilet
by xoxo bb lightskin May 11, 2020
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Milking the colon

When you (or someone else) insert fingers inside your rectum and massage your colon until you ejaculate
"Last night my girlfriend wanted to get freaky, so she milked my colon" milking the colon
by Themilkman94 August 13, 2017
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colon rollin'

The act of placing an xtc pill up your arse so that you can get a better effect quicker since it is absorbed directly through the anal tissue.
Q:Does that mean you're gay if you've ever been colon rollin'?
A:Only if you let another man insert it in your freakin' arse, e-tard!
by sikwill October 20, 2005
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colon cleansing

A massive and foul smelling fart that comes out with such force that you feel like your insides have been cleaned out.
(said in the famous Klump dinner scene #1 in the Nutty Professor (1996).

"You want your colon cleansed?"
"Fine I'm gona clean mine."
FART!
"There now my colons clean I'm taking squeaky clean."
"I gave myself a good colon cleansing right before entering the car." "However the nasty ass smell still stunk up the whose damn vehicle."
by ************** November 22, 2007
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