Beached whale

Also known as Desi. A large goober-headed she/male with a body that resembles a trash bag filled with mango pulp. It's face is the spitting image of a bulldog, and like a bulldog, desi will hump anything with, or without, a pulse. Smells like a sun-dried tuna fish, and close sources say it is so womped it looks like a Picasso down there. Stay away from the desi. It might sit on you, or eat you. It's unpredictable.

This beached whale is just another reminder that accidents DO happen and some people should put a condom on it.

by TheObsure February 18, 2015

Beached Whale Status

The moment in which you now no longer resemble a human being but look more like a beached whale ready to take its eternal rest. protocal requires you to update you facebook status to read "beached whale status", but chances are your not gonna get it up there.

**You are now at the point of no return, you will not move for the rest of the night unless there is an emergency**

idiot: yo hand me my phone

You: dude i cant im beached whale status right now

by Mr.DirkAsFuck March 5, 2011

Beanhead

Some who is being a beanhead is someone that is being dumb so there brain is a bean

Gaz is such a beanhead he put his boxers on backwards

by Jez clarkson July 31, 2021

Awkward Beached Whale

N. In the same category as the awkward turtle, awkward flag, and awkward moose, the awkward beached whale is the act of placing one's palms face-down on-top-of each other, such that the thumbs stick out to either side. The individual then proceeds to alternately wiggle the thumbs. For maximum awkwardness, proceed to make sounds similar to that of the blue whale.

V. To do as described above.

Person 1: "Wow, I feel awkward."

Multiple People: "Hmm, not us. I guess it's just you."

Person 1: *Does awkward beached whale hand motions*

"Whooo...oahhhh....wahooah"

*Feels exceedingly less awkward*

Multiple People: "Wow, we feel awkward now."

by captainduncan December 10, 2008

beanhead

a beanhead is a head with sticks out at the back alot like an alien head

its like a deformed ballon thats a beanhead

by adam morton July 26, 2008

beached whale

The act of taking a shit on the toilet seat and missing the toilet completely.

I was so drunk that I left a beached whale in your bathroom last night.

by spo April 7, 2005

Beached

The act of defecating in a manner such that the turd does not get submerged in water, but instead resides on the inside of the toilet bowl (possibly indefinitely). Like a beached whale.

Bro, somebody beached a giant in the men's room.

by Anonymous75B May 8, 2008