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Pork Scotch pizza

The world's finest pizza topping. The pizza of choice of fat security guards it consists of a Marguerita pizza topped with pork and gravy.
Why is that security guard so fucking fat?

You'd be fat if you ate 3 Pork Scotch pizzas every day.
by Lumpbag May 4, 2009
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Pork Scotch friends

Imaginary friends. People who simply don't exist. A bit like Facebook friends. Named for the fact that Pork Scotch has no friends at all because he is such a complete twat.
Monk: So who's coming to this barbecue then? Pork Scotch's friends?

Dad: You're talking stupid. Pork Scotch doesn't have any friends. He has Pork Scotch friends.
by Lumpbag August 15, 2009
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Scotch Watch

the result of drinking too much, or preferably scotch. when the victim falls asleep, they get a ballsack slapped on their wrist, thus the notorious Scotch Watch
Frat Boy 1:Dude, Jerry passed out!
Frat Boy 2: dude, it's a perfect time to give him a Scotch Watch!
Frat Boy 1: Ehh, you're right, he's a pledge anyway
by Ya Boy Trax June 16, 2010
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bitches gonna get stitches

a phrase used when some ho steps out of her bounds - connoting the use of violence to mediate disputes.
Person 1: Karen just slept with Sarah's man.
Person 2: Oh no she di'n't!
Sarah: Bitches gonna get stitches!
by Tank Morris and Clutch Kerley January 12, 2004
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Scotchy Mother

A disgusting old hag with hairs growing out of the wrinkles on its liver spots. She is the mother Pork Scotch and even more scotchy than the Porky Scotcher himself. It is constantly driven around in the Scotchy Mother Wheelchair by Scotchman and Goofy Granny.
Monk: The chair's there! Is the Scotchy Mother here?

Mick: No. Porky just took it out of the half car while he was raising the back seat to make it a bed.
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Scotch Fugly

The highest level of ugliness. A truly unbelievable degree of repulsiveness usually only achieved by little fat security guards.
Ugliness levels:

1 ugly

2 pug ugly

3 fugly

4 pug fugly

5 super pug fugly

6 scotch fugly
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Scotchuesday

is a weekly drinking holiday with the sole purpose of drinking Scotch on Tuesdays.

Acceptable liquor variations are - Whiskey or Bourbon.
Jordan looked forward to Scotchuesday, where should could sip her scotch in the company of good friends and a fine cigar.
by North Park Crew December 8, 2010
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