Laptop Microphone

A really fucking bad microphone that sounds like a built in laptop banana.

Horrible Microphone Kid: OMG IM SO GOOD AT THIS GAME GUYS IM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU!
Studio Microphone Guy: Shut the fuck up and stop using your Laptop Microphone

by YoMommaJokesAreOld June 13, 2015

Missouri microphone

When you engage in anal sex with a lover, and go straight to oral sex with another.

Dude, I can't believe she sang into my Missouri microphone last night...

by Chilebeso October 22, 2015

Purple microphone

Penis

Giving head is called "singing into the purple microphone"

by Purpmic December 27, 2019

The Microphone

An extreme version of The Screwdriver where your hand comes out the mouth

Man dude Patrick really did The Microphone on me I'm so sore

by Realskskdude April 28, 2019

Microphone Head

Look at the top of your head.

Dis Bois head is a microphone head.

by Bottletop69 May 28, 2018

Microphone Sausage

When you put a sausage on a microphone so you can eat while hella gaming.

Person 1: I commuted microphone sausage yesterday
Person 2: Thats an act of war

by ItzzRyanYo September 16, 2020

Microphone Molesting

When you're face timing someone and the microphone is being viciously blown into, rubbed on, etc.

"Stop microphone molesting, my ears hurt!"

by A Collection of Satanists October 9, 2017