Wank Muffin

1) A juvenile (and British) term for someone who masturbates often.

2) A general derogatory term for someone who is disliked.

3) A delicious muffin product filled with a white and sticky fluid which is being called "semen", produced by the Wank™ Corporation.
1) "Dude, you need to cut down on how much you masturbate, you fuckin' wank muffin."

2) "Shut the hell up, wank muffin."

3) "Wank Muffins. Now with 50% more semen!"
by Meik April 04, 2003
Get the Wank Muffin mug.

Taking a wank!

Expression used when you don't want to say what you are up to.
Bob: Hello
Jim: Hello
Bob: What are you up to?
Jim: Taking a wank!
by Hello I am Gay February 15, 2007
Get the Taking a wank! mug.

Comfort Wank

A Comfort Wank is an act of masturbation carried out by an emotionally stressed 'wanker', in an effort to soothe his woes with cheap sexual thrills. After a Comfort Wank, the said 'wanker' will usually cry himself to sleep.
Jimbo had had a bad day. After drowning his sorrows in a cheap beer at the local pub, he hobbled home, crawled into bed, reached for his vaseline and had a Comfort Wank.
by thehitcher03 August 03, 2009
Get the Comfort Wank mug.

Spank-Wank

A sad, masturbating, perv who tries to touch every ass he possibly can for pleasure even though he knows he will fail miserably. spanker wanker spank wank perv
1) This total Spank-Wank tried to feel me up at the station I totally cracket his bloody nut!
2) I know it's creepy but Spank-Wanks actually turn me on!
by Waztum September 12, 2008
Get the Spank-Wank mug.

Womb Wank

Whilst your other half is having a C section to your first born, you slide your penis inside your partners vagina and she proceeds to jerk you off through the C section hole in her stomach.
My wife gave birth to our first born!

Did you receive a womb wank ?
by Mikkydoohan September 12, 2008
Get the Womb Wank mug.

cunt wank

A rough,one sided act of love between a man and a woman.Notions of foreplay,scented candles and soft music go out the window in favour of a swift,joyless hump.
Pulled this stunner last nite,but I was so coked up I had a quick cunt wank and met up with the lads to go joy ride'in
by shitty Nicko November 25, 2004
Get the cunt wank mug.

wank rag

A rag, usually used after masturbation to clean up the nasties.
Billy, the cat is licking your wank rag again!
by CommunistWithAGun December 29, 2003
Get the wank rag mug.