presbyterian church

the preservers of the faith of god that is all things preserved... ie born again ... mirical healing ... the list of all things preserved... they preserve also all humans rights to existance

the scots were the first of the presbyterian church and in doing so saved many an old warrior from the grim fate of death by giving them to there daughters to save and birth again by means of divine dynasterial rights

by angus macfarlane March 17, 2007

church

Verb. To drink alchoholic beverages
This word was created and named for the Brookline, MA area bar "Church".

"I'm going churching tonight"

"Yo, are you gonna church or what?"

by prison97 March 15, 2010

catholic church

religion that is supposdely ruled by love. In earlier times the catholic church did and still tries to instill fear into followerrs by basing their religion with fear of wrong doing punishable by going to hell once person is dead. (Hell is actually a Norse belief that catholics adopted from Norse religious beliefs of the after life. Merely changed to two l's on spelling and having a big dude in red pyjamas called satan to rule it instead of a half rotting non-mortal bitter woman called hel.)
Through the use of fear and piety of positions and dogmatic view of their religion, cathlics priests believe their religion to be the true church. (Yeah like i haven't heard that from about 50 other religions.)
Priests in modern times have been uncovered as child molesters and other despicable acts. The self righteousnees held by some catholics is digusting and all consuming, either way firm catholic or the ones that go on easter and christmas only, everything they say needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

V: Sodomy is a sin according to the catholic church.
C: well buggery to that, i'll do whatever the hell i feel like. DOesn't stop priests from bending little altar boys over.

by george/metalhed June 17, 2005

church junk

church dogma, rituals, etc

i was workin' this babe at foolsley's, but when she started talking church junk; i went limp!!

by michael foolsley November 30, 2009

Jon church

The hottest shit jumpin out the coffee pot da shit.easily defined as god

That person is so cool his name must be jon church

by the pretzel master June 26, 2009

Catholic Church

N., (kath-lick Ch-er-ch): A place of worship of Jesus and yelling adult-themed jokes until the bishop takes you to the monastery in the back and spanks you while you are naked.

Priest: "Welcome to St.Shithead Catholic Church!"

by FelixHunter November 23, 2014

Catholic Church

As practiced in the United States, the Catholic Church is a form of organized crime designed to assist sexually confused and underdeveloped men (called, Priests) in having sex with underage boys on a weekly basis, referred to as "Sunday Mass".

Parent: We have strong religious beliefs and are proud members of the Catholic Church.

Translation: We are irresponsible parents who have subjected our sons to frequent child molestation.

by IHateEveryone October 26, 2018