Give the monkey what she wants

To put forth the necessary effort to ensure the satisfaction of all involved parties in a particular situation.

“This presentation needs to be perfect, or my boss is going to be up my ass crack without a paddle. I’m really going to have to give the monkey what she wants, or I’ll be out of a job faster than you can say ‘Can you lend a coworker a pencil?’”

by Skronx July 5, 2021

Beat by the monkeys

To be badly beaten by hoards of individually pathetic opponents. The expression is believed to be derived from an event that occurred to a cutter who was severely injured by a hoard of angry spider monkeys. However, it's also used commonly by soldiers referring to fellow trained fighters who're defeated by civilians...

Poor Captain Jack, he was an MMA fighter but he still got beat by the monkeys when he was drunk at a grocery store and started a fight with some bagboys.

by Zed Numar July 13, 2021

Angolan spider monkey

When you a woman has her legs behind her head and you proceed to give her cunnilingus whilst pinning her against the wall

This chick was so flexible i was able to go at her while she was doing the Angolan spider monkey

by Nostalgia inc. July 26, 2021

beat the monkey to the road

To "beat the monkey to the road" is to anticipate an issue and take steps to mitigate it before it becomes a problem. Being proactive.

"Let's beat the monkey to the road and pick up the beer when we go for the crabs. We don't want to be stuck sitting in traffic!"

by kastagire July 28, 2021

Spank the Monkey

A well known phrase, usually exclaimed in commentary when Clydebank FC's Nicky Little scores a goal

That is absolutely SPANK THE MONKEY from Nicky Little. That is disgusting!

by Doricbankie96 July 31, 2021

Mississippi Earth Monkey

Definition: When two crackheads fuck in the mud getting covered in it

I saw two Mississippi Earth Monkeys fucking behind the 7/11.

by Moosemilk01 August 14, 2021

Buying a monkey

A situation in which someone who has recently come into a very large sum of money goes and buys weird, unusual, or taboo things, simply because they can. The phrase itself is derived from Michael Jackson, who bought a pet chimpanzee named Bubbles in the 80's following the success of his album Thriller.

Person 1: I've just fucking won 20 million in the lottery

Person 2: Man, that's a lot of money, what are you going to buy?

Person 1: I'm buying a monkey.

by rollacethejazzmaster September 5, 2021