by lolitsalex October 29, 2015
Battle-Jesus is the modernized savior from old. This version of Jesus tots a handgun, and tots an Uzi. Instead of the peaceful all-loving savior we are used to knowing, Battle-Jesus faces you with fire and brimestone. Destroying the sinners, and cleansing the world of all evil. This meaning that only hippies will be left, because they just sit around and smoke dope, and love the trees. And the bible aint saying nothin bout tree-sex.
Though, there have been, of course, varied versions of Battle-Jesus made throughout the course of history. Most notabley, a GI Joe Jesus figure.
Though, there have been, of course, varied versions of Battle-Jesus made throughout the course of history. Most notabley, a GI Joe Jesus figure.
Battle-Jesus!
Battle-Jesus is here.
Battle-Jesus!
Sinners cower in fear.
Battle-Jesus!
Armageddon on your Doorstep.
Battle-Jesus!
Death 'til only hippies are left.
Battle-Jesus!
Battle-Jesus is here.
Battle-Jesus!
Sinners cower in fear.
Battle-Jesus!
Armageddon on your Doorstep.
Battle-Jesus!
Death 'til only hippies are left.
Battle-Jesus!
by Battle-Jesus January 27, 2007
Jesus is everything in my life
by tysan ibraTyson ibrahim cha January 01, 2018
It is believed that Jesus is a potato. He infact was not human like the bible sugests. Pages were ripped out of the original bible with all of the information and proof that Jesus was a potato. They have been recovered and the pages are believed to be Salt and Vinegar flavoured.
God knew that potato's were a superior species to humans and a perfect vessel for our savior. The human that claimed he was jesus was nailed to a cross for his stupid ideas, the real jesus "Potato Jesus" revived fake jesus being sympathetic to the pathetic human.
Potato Jesus' whereabouts are unknown but philosophers believe he built a Spud bag mothership and ventured onward to the world ruled by potatos and where humans are grown in the ground.
God knew that potato's were a superior species to humans and a perfect vessel for our savior. The human that claimed he was jesus was nailed to a cross for his stupid ideas, the real jesus "Potato Jesus" revived fake jesus being sympathetic to the pathetic human.
Potato Jesus' whereabouts are unknown but philosophers believe he built a Spud bag mothership and ventured onward to the world ruled by potatos and where humans are grown in the ground.
by ScurryInertia September 28, 2005
by Junpei July 28, 2007
adj. Describing something REALLY awesome, like the namesake. If using the word is contrary to your religious beliefs, it is acceptable to use the Spanish pronunciation: "hay-soose."
by Hasotweb December 07, 2009
by blowjob7 April 28, 2008