jesus pod

Apple's 16Gig iPod Touch, one of the most hyped and sought after iPods to date. It is often mistaken for the Jesus Phone.

"Is that the Jesus Phone? No it's the Jesus Pod."

by Kiyotaka October 10, 2007

jesus wafer

The thin, brittle slice of "bread" that passes for the body of Christ during communion. It is, of course, washed down with a swig of Jesus juice.

Gregg: Why are you awake now? You were hammered last night.
Doug: Dude, I'm getting dragged to church.
Gregg: Oh, lame.
Doug: It's cool. I can space out until they serve the jesus wafers. They always help my hangover.

by Doug E Fresh Barcelona November 22, 2009

Pure Jesus

When something is extremly awesome.(Picture it as a can of some liquid.)

Tom: How was that concert last night? Did it rock?
Nick: Man, It was Pure Jesus!!

by Jack Of Hearts!! April 1, 2009

the bearded jesus

When your trabagging your girl and accidentally shart

I was tea bagging my girl the other night and accidentally sharted on her face. She look like the bearded jesus

by Tweeter23 October 5, 2018

Jesus On Fiverr

Jesus is an internet celebrity who you can hire to say any thing you want on the website Fiverr. He will dress ina jesus costume and say your message. Many YouTubers (such as Pewdiepie, and JackSucksAtLife) have hired him.

You should make Jesus On Fiverr say it.

by PickleRickle123 August 31, 2018

jesus tanning

Turning one's forearms over during tanning or extended time in the sunlight, in order to better tan the pale backs of one's forearms. This technique was created to also help prevent sunburn on one's forearms. The performer takes on a pose similar to that of Jesus on the cross.

Observer: "Why are you holding your arms like that?"

Performer: "I'm Jesus tanning! Burnt forearms are the devil's work!"

by Robert Chives July 28, 2014

Porn Jesus

A term used to define a well hung dark-haired male with a beard and long hair.

Damn, have you seen that porn Jesus over there? He's hot!!

by Ruby-Slippers July 25, 2016