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You need Jesus!

Its the act of telling someone they need a whole lotta help; referring to people who are way past the point of return
Bethany: I have a foot fetish
Mike: You need Jesus!
Bethany: OMG I know
by realniQQa143 May 27, 2016
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Jesus Christ and a half

Sometimes saying Jesus Christ just isn't enough...
Guy #1: Homie... you got a buck or two I can borrow?

Guy #2: Jesus Christ and a half, Carlo! How many times do I have to fucking tell you? I'm done lending you prostitute money.
by reid_o April 5, 2009
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Related Words

Jessie

Jessie is the greatest girl in the world! She smells greats, looks great, and is great!

She is kind and lovely. Flowers bow to her as their queen and fair maidens gaze in adoration of how lovely she is! Her sweat is perfume and her poops are works of art. There's nothing more lovely than Jessie. She lights up every room she enters and makes the boy she loves feel complete. She is everything wonderful encapsulated in a lovely floral pill. She is addictive and yet you can't overdose on the love that oozes out of her like a jelly-filled donut of love.

Don't ever let go of Jessie if you have her. She's the best thing that exists on this planet.

Plus, she knows the chorus of Future's "Mask Off" by heart. Man, if that ain't enough, I don't know what is?

She is not just beautiful, but smart as well.

She can prepare excel forms in a jiff! Boo Yah!
She is also kind. She's helpful and has an excellent smile. Dentist use her as a reference.

But for reals, that's a Jessie!
Ooh, that Jessie so sweet! Imma have to call the doctor for more insulin son!

Boy 1: I just got a cupcake from that girl for no apparent reason.

Boy 2: that's nice.

Boy 1: yeah, I think that girl was a Jessie.

Man, I wish I was as lucky enough to have a Jessie.

Flowers: "we adore you, our queen!"
*flowers bowing*
by SmoothBrownChocolate July 24, 2017
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Jesus Chicken

The slang term for a chain of fast-food restaurants called Chik-Fil-A. Usually used in a derogatory term to refer to their strongly Christian policies (being closed on Sundays explicitly for their employees to attend church), anti-gay policies and extremely large financial contributions to anti-gay-rights bills and amendments, both of which stem from the owners' interpretations of their denomination of the Christian bible.
I'm hungry, wanna go get some Jesus Chicken?
by Joreth November 16, 2011
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Dirty Jessica

When a girl gives an over the pants hand job at a party with family and friends present.
Butch totally got a Dirty Jessica at the family Christmas party.
by OTPHJ123 April 13, 2016
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Jessyca

An unique name only given to those whose parents are smart enough to be creative. People with this name are extremely successful and overwhelming beautiful. Simply put, those called Jessyca are amazing.
Wow, look at Jessyca, she's amazing!
by The JessYca February 3, 2010
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Jesus Antenna

The hands up in the air that evangelical christians hold up while singing and praying.
Look at that crowd in the amy grant video! Every single one of em is holding up a Jesus antenna!
by Pray4rain October 24, 2010
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