Schmacko Sex

Schmacko Sex is sex given or withheld as reward or punishment for actions performed or omitted. Schmacko sex is instigated by conscious thought instead of a combination of the loins and emotion.

Schmackos are marketed as an irresistably powerful and instant behavour-altering dog treat. It is futile for any dog to try and resist their seductive, delicious allure.

'Gee you've done the dishes let's have sex'

'I won't sleep with you until you buy me that fridge'

'Bad partner. No schmacko sex for you! Sit! Stay ...I didn't say Beg!'.

by Tom Nott February 1, 2009

schmacky

Noun--The act of peeing into one's own mouth.

Origins: This act is a standard fraternity hazing ritual within the local chapter of a national fraternity at a small southern California university. Onomatopoetic in nature, "schmacky" approximates the sound of a pledge attempting to say the name of the fraternity's founder with a mouthful of urine.

The pad thai was so hot that, with no access to other beverages, Tad was forced to pull a schmacky.

by peterkin March 19, 2009

schmack

When you smack someone for a legitimate reason, but social norms still see you as assaulting someone, eg, Sean Connery saying it's okay to slap women who have done wrong to him, or a recent event in Brooklyn Heights where a man slapped a parent in a Starbucks for being a bad parent.

*child running around a Starbucks*

Man 1: Hey dude, control your kid. He just knocked a coffee out of my hand.

Man 2: Bro, I'm waiting for my latte! Hold on!

Man 1: Bitch, don't get schmaked.

Man 2: shut up!

*Man 1 Delivers a Schmack on Man 2*

Barista: I'm callin the cops!

by King Pontus December 11, 2009

schmagma

a pungent, pasty, and gooey substance that forms in the foreskin of a penis.

After three days of extraneous activity and no shower my dick formed a very unpleasant type of schmagma.

by bac bac bac January 30, 2010

schmalcohol

secret code word for alcohol

Dude, make sure you bring the schmalcohol to the party, or else we won't get crizunk.

by J T Dollar Sign September 26, 2003

schmag

overweight unattractive cougar with to much makeup that hits on men at closing time.

the schmag relentlessly hit on the young man

by spikola February 4, 2010

schmaljohn

The girl that got away. Beautiful, sexy, heartbreaker. Usually blonde but this type of chick changes her hair color with the season. Very confident in themselves but enough to get away from their loser ex boyfriends. This is a warning -- Schmaljohn encounters will hurt you badly.

"oh man, you hear about chris? he liked the schmaljohn.."
"awful, he'll never recover"

by blaker30101 February 4, 2010