Protein retention scheme

The act of consuming one's own semen to retain the proteins within it.

Person 1: Hey bro how do you get so much protein?
Person 2: I use the protein retention scheme

by SexFuelledManiacUwU January 5, 2023

rattensaft

A man in his mid 40's with a greasy mullet
Plays pool, but he is shit
Has a fat wife
Takes exchange students into his bedroom, examples include warsops first colombian
Likened to a white Mr-T by liam davis
Wears too much fake gold jewellry, and looks a chuffer

Dude, your dad is rattensaft

by Number 1 in ALAN Squared July 20, 2006

reteard

Reteard • \re-Tear-da\ • noun

1 : A retard that is so retarded it brings a tear(s) to your eye.

2 a: A man or woman that is above and beyond the average retard

2 b: a man or woman who does or says things that even a normal retard wouldn't do or say

Reteared •\re-TEAR-ded\ • adjective

1: Used to describe someone's actions when simply calling them a retard doesn't quite sum it up; fairly atleast.

2: Used to describe someone's actions when they are worst than that of a normal or average retard; leading to tear(s) of embarrassment. You are likely embarrassed for them.

"Wow, that chick is a reteard. She just walked into a parked 18 wheeler. "

"That was the most retearded thing i have ever seen. Did she really just back up to the drive thru window to get ketchup and refill her drink?"

Guy 1 - "that guys is retearded"
Guy 2 - "Yah bro, he's wasted. I saw him take a piss right on the dance floor not even ten seconds ago"

by top cheddar November 29, 2009

Resteraunt

A common misspelling of the word Restauraunt.

Resteraunt is a misspelled word.

by mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm January 9, 2008

retention

In general, from the Latin, it means "holding back" The word is used in Medicine for constipation, an impaction of the large intestine by feces. It also refers to the closure of the bladder resulting in an awful bursting pain, because not a drop of urine will come out. That can happen by taking in too many liquids, ignoring the need to piss for hours, and having the full bladder rest on the urethra thus closing it down or having an enlarged prostate pressing on the same tube that empties the bladder. Many drugs, such as cough syrup and some antidepressants, cause temporary retention. Recreational drugs such as ecstasy, morphine, codeine and heroin and methadone may close down the bladder, sometimes for 24 hours. Surgery near the bladder area may upset the local nerves and may lead to retention of urine for 24 to 48 hours or more.

One of my friends took a lot of ecstasy at at a party. After about 5 hours he had a terrible need to empty his bursting bladder. He couldn't pass any pee, not a drop. That went on for 18 hours until he could urinate. That retention led him to give up drugs. Last year I had a hernia operation. After I came to, a beautiful nurse palpated my bladder area and found I had retention of urine. I hadn't gone for about 10 hours. I said I'll go to the toilet. Nothing would come out. I was glad when she held my penis, catheterized me, and emptied out about a quart of piss. Retention of urine is no fun not even when a good looking nurse opened me up.

by Ivy League 82 October 14, 2009

anal retention

Anal retention is holding on to a monster poo when you can't get to the toilet.

Father George's poor anal retention cost him all credibility during the sermon, when he sneezed and defecated himself with a revolting spray

by Seal Clubbing Instructor April 5, 2010

Cake Retention Syndrome

Otherwise known as KIPLINGITIS. The body compulsively attracts all cake within a mile radius and stores it in special grease pouches developed in the stomach, buttocks, thighs, bingo wings and ankles. Vanessa Feltz is a celebrity sufferer of this condition. Indeed, such is her ability to retain mountains of cake that her name has been lent to the more acute form of the disease known as FELTZISM (See FAT FUCKS IN THE MEDIA).

"It was tragic, she had severe Cake Retention Syndrome - It was a bit like looking at a Battenburg in a tracksuit."

"The Kiplingitis caused the thighs to chaff sufficiently for spontaneous combustion to occur. The smell of baked goods could be discerned for several miles."

by Dr. Goatfondler October 12, 2011