stealth masterbating

When one wacks off as quietly as possible so as to not disturb the people in the same room.

Sam: I hope no one notices I am stealth masterbating
Girl friend: Sam ... are you wacking off!!!!
Sam: Oh Shit!

by themanwiththeplan9192 April 4, 2010

Masterbating Monkey

A primate creature who masterbates.

"Monkey Masterbation Spotting" has become a hobby in the South American State of illinois. A well known competitor in the sport of of Monkey Masterbation Spotting is Fred Phelps, a very vocal and fanatically religeous biggot.

The monkey wrapped his primate hand around his primate pink penis, and masterbated furiously untill he fell out of his tree. Fred Phelps watched in glee as he photographed the event so he could show the pictures to his family.

by Gordon Freeman October 31, 2004

masterbate

The way noobs to "Masturbation" spell it.

"Yo dude! Lets go masterbate together!", said the 10 year old.
"Hell yeah!", replied the old man.

by MasterMastur. September 3, 2009

Masterbation

1. Masturbation after one attains a new rank or does an important feat, or anything that would make one feel important.

2. Masturbation while in a rank of power or authority.

"Today was a great day, I won the spelling bee then i Masterbated."

"Dude you're 9... masterbation?"

"Feels Good man."

by KooKid October 23, 2009

masterbating

a common mispelling of the word "masturbating", which is the ING form of wordmasturbation

1337_g33k: Im masterbating to porn
Normal person: Good to know.

by Anonymous March 15, 2003

Laws of Masterbation

1) you may only jizz on a guy if he is dead or unconscious.

2) You may only jizz on a girl if she is alive and conscious.

3) you may not jizz in front of family members

4) you may not jizz in front of a guy unless both of you are jizzing on the same girl.

feel free to add more.

Dude, you just broke the first and third laws of masterbation by jizzing on your dad!

by anon113618436 January 5, 2010

masterbait

1. the wrong way to spell masturbate
2. the best brand of bait, just like Master Lock...not really

1.
guy1: I masterbait when i'm bored
guy2: what a noob

2. this doesn't exist

by whatserface July 23, 2007