A Kipper

Someone who is two faced, with no guts.

Don’t trust him, he’s just a kipper. (a two faced bastard with no guts)

by swichme July 9, 2012

done up like a kipper

Blimey yes these drugs are working.

"He doesn't even remember being there..."
"Yeah, he was done up like a kipper"

by Earl Montmorency Grey July 18, 2005

Tickle The Kipper

To tickle ones kipper means to give a boy a hand job.

Jesse: i saw you with that dude last night, what happened?
Ellen: oh you know the usual
Jesse: youu tickle the kipper?
Ellen: ohh yeaaa

by Jokes4ufolks October 1, 2009

smoked kipper

A vagina after its been given a serious shaggin'.

I banged her out that fast and hard last neet, I left her with a smoked kipper!

by Fezzbomb December 18, 2017

Hairy Kipper

To have a hairy kipper is to be extremely agitated, angry and worked up about an issue. Similar to being triggered.

Friend 1 - "Can I stay over at your house tonight?"

Friend 2 - "Don't think so mate, my mum would throw a hairy kipper."

OR

"Someone asked my mum to do a painting for them and she had a hairy kipper"

by TheHairyKipper May 31, 2021

Flying Kipper

A large shipment of fish.

I have to take a Flying Kipper over tomorrow

by Henry The Green Engine January 1, 2024

Picking your kipper

Heard recently in the NW of England, used by an elderly lady in a bank whilst speaking to a member of staff. She had just opened one of the cashier's desks..."watcha been doin', picking your kipper?"

Assumed to imply that the aforementioned lady had been scratching her vagina, or possibly masturbating. Her reply was not documented.....

"watcha been doin', picking your kipper?"

by Deepestblue March 6, 2013