Floridian Lecture

When she pulls a knife in the middle of an argument.
We were fighting about me being out all night drinking and she gave me a Floridian Lecture.
by yesitsyesrod February 03, 2024
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Branch Floridians

An intellectual collective founded in 1997 that is dedicated to lateral thinking and bad taste. It is often unclear if it is a religion disguised as a joke, or a joke disguised as a religion -- much in the same vein as The Church of the Subgenius or Discordianism. They maintain an expansive website at www.branchfloridians.org and regularly put out e-zines called "The World Domination Update." The group's self-professed objective is "think for yourself!"

At first glance, the Branch Floridians appear to be an ultra-fundamentalist cult, but anyone paying attention should quickly realize this is a sarcastic fascade. Admittedly, though, it is often difficult to tell when they are being serious, and when they are joking. Such pranksterism is deliberately designed to provoke people into *thinking*.
The group has no relation to MSN member and crusader Michelson-Morley or any of his alter-ego/pseudonics. There is a member of the Branch Floridians named Reverend FairInHeight 451, and Fairinheight451 is also a name used by Michelson-Morley. This is a coincidence, though it understandably has caused some confusion among people who dislike MM for his activities in policing several rogue communities that break the MSN Code of Conduct. Michelson-Morley is *not* a member of the Branch Floridians, though respects their ideas.
by Manager December 16, 2004
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Floridians

The only people who are so friendly, the let their red-neck cyclists ride in their interstates.
Person 1: Bro again cyclists in the interstate?
Person 2: Thats just what floridians do.
by Knmagor June 24, 2023
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Floridian

Publix loving crackheads that basically live in another country because were on our own playing field
Foreigner: Look its a crackhead

Floridian: Yes, I am a crackhead
by vanwinkl January 16, 2025
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Floridian Breakfast

The act of Eating McNuggets and drinking a Four Loko in the shower. This is usually done after sleeping in until the early afternoon, but it can technically be done any time of the day. Some individuals also “salt” the rim of their Four Loko with methamphetamine crystals, however this variation is unique to certain regions and is not considered “traditional”.
Kyle: Hey Sarah, do you want anything to eat?
Sarah: No thanks, I just had a Floridian Breakfast and I’m feeling pretty good.
by CatDaddy2022 February 03, 2024
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Floridian Crockpot

The act of inserting your genitals, preferably a male, into a crocodile resulting in the separation of one's genitals from their body.
1: "Sir, how did you lose your penis?"
2: "I Uh..."
1: "Sir, you're going to have to tell me. We must know."
2: "I prefer a Floridian Crockpot behind Disney World."
by M1rc4t March 12, 2024
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Pulling a Floridian

Doing some dumb or fucked up shit that could be done By a person from and/or living in the State of Florida
Cletus: “Gawdamn man I was huntin’ For some gator and shot marge in the arm”
Bo: “Aw shit cuz that’s Pulling a Floridian right there”
by PinkPantherPapa February 25, 2018
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