Commitment Whore

Someone who is desperate for meaningful/long lasting relationships and seeks them out.

Girl 1: “I’m talking to this new guy, I can see it lasting a long time!”
Girl 2: “you think every guy is the one, your such a commitment whore”

by BigBrownChungus March 8, 2025

Coochie Commitment

The male (hetero) equivalent of a “dick appointment”.

“Sorry bros, you’ll have to go on without me. I’ve got a coochie commitment with that girl from the health dept.”

by DiabloConQueso July 17, 2025

Micro-Commitment Crisis

The sudden panic that hits when someone asks you to make a harmless, tiny decision, like choosing a pen color, picking a Spotify queue song, or deciding which side of a sandwich to eat first, and your brain temporarily shuts down as if you’re negotiating peace treaties.

“Bro asked me to pick a playlist and I had a full micro-commitment crisis.”

by yo.its.furk December 3, 2025

Cable and Commitment

When you've been in a committed relationship for 10+ years and you'd rather get off to reruns of softcore HBO/Cinemax/Showtime pornos than have sex with your significant other.

(Wife walks into the living room wearing an "I heart ellen" t-shirt, sweatpants, and crocs)

Wife: Hey, honey. Wanna Netflix and Chill tonight? *wink*

Husband: Ugh

(Husband places his left hand down his pants and his right hand on the U-verse remote)

Husband: Looks like it's a Cable and Commitment night

by Andy Fong Chong March 21, 2016

false-hope-commitment

when you break off every other relationship you have for one person you hope to date in the future and then realize how unlikely a relationship is with them.

a person who suffers from false-hope-commitment is probably also depressed, if not they will be.

did you see them they look like their suffering from false-hope-commitment

by Anarchon March 17, 2021