Irritating, overly-confident, arrogant, uneducated Street Monkey, indigenous to Scotland and much much harder than the english chavs.
Males are usually found wearing Ned Tartan Caps (Burberry)and brightly coloured Shellsuits. Their habitat usually includes off-licenses that sell Buckfast (or a "Bottle of Whit the fuck ye gawking at, ya bawbag" as it is locally known) Their IQ is usually around five points short of a cannibis plant, which they smoke consistantly in a vain hope of increasing intelligence. They tend to hunt in packs or 10-20 and can be menancing to the rest of the general public - Although if you lamp the gobbiest wee shite amongst them and the pituitary retard (6'4" at 14 years old) then generally they run away making baboon noises and disappear into the undergrowth for a couple of hours. The male communicates with other males in grunts, farts and burps and simple phrases like "Gie's a swally o yer bucky man" and "check the airse on thon wee hairy" which are about the limit of speech their education allows.
The female of the species is defined by the wobble of lard which cocoons her body and this is only held in place by here over-stretched thong and too small bra. Most of the females will be pregnant before the age of sixteen unless the nedette is in Dundee when she will be pregnant by 13 years old. The females are like magpies in that they like things which are shiny and will marry their male ned for the price of a £19.99 ring from Elizabeth Duke's in Argos even if it causes their fingers to turn green.
Alternatively if the male ned is simply "Wantin his hole" then all he has to do is purchase or steal a 3 litre bottle of Frosty Jack's Chemical - never seen an apple - Cider which when placed in the line of sight of a nedette causes her lard to burst her thong and for her legs to spread rapidly even before he offers her a swally..
Males are usually found wearing Ned Tartan Caps (Burberry)and brightly coloured Shellsuits. Their habitat usually includes off-licenses that sell Buckfast (or a "Bottle of Whit the fuck ye gawking at, ya bawbag" as it is locally known) Their IQ is usually around five points short of a cannibis plant, which they smoke consistantly in a vain hope of increasing intelligence. They tend to hunt in packs or 10-20 and can be menancing to the rest of the general public - Although if you lamp the gobbiest wee shite amongst them and the pituitary retard (6'4" at 14 years old) then generally they run away making baboon noises and disappear into the undergrowth for a couple of hours. The male communicates with other males in grunts, farts and burps and simple phrases like "Gie's a swally o yer bucky man" and "check the airse on thon wee hairy" which are about the limit of speech their education allows.
The female of the species is defined by the wobble of lard which cocoons her body and this is only held in place by here over-stretched thong and too small bra. Most of the females will be pregnant before the age of sixteen unless the nedette is in Dundee when she will be pregnant by 13 years old. The females are like magpies in that they like things which are shiny and will marry their male ned for the price of a £19.99 ring from Elizabeth Duke's in Argos even if it causes their fingers to turn green.
Alternatively if the male ned is simply "Wantin his hole" then all he has to do is purchase or steal a 3 litre bottle of Frosty Jack's Chemical - never seen an apple - Cider which when placed in the line of sight of a nedette causes her lard to burst her thong and for her legs to spread rapidly even before he offers her a swally..
Examples of neds can be found outside any off-licence in Scotland for the males and outside the nurseries at home time for the females
by Gypsy Laird April 02, 2008
A Scottish term for the often uneducated and invariably aggressive teenagers found throughout Britain. Identified by gold jewellery (especially sovereign rings), baseball caps, white trainers and/or Kappa/Burberry branded clothing. The name is thought to derive from 'Edward', as in teddy boy. It is in no way an acronym for "non-educated delinquent", which is in any case ungrammatical.
by Potatojunkie February 07, 2005
A young spotty unemployed shellsuit wearing tink, who thinks thunderbird is a drink for posh people, his ambition is to go to jail and offend as many normal people as possible, the highlight of his week is giro day or slashing someone at the weekend, scared to look at you on his own, but thinks he is hard as fuck in a group of 20 other neds, picks fag buts from the street and hassles people for spare change.
by Paul January 14, 2004
a general wee prick who will pick fights with those who are differant when in large groups. when alone a ned will shit his trackies and run.
last week a wee ned whop started on me happened to get stuck in an elevator on his own the front of my new rocks are now permanantly broken thanks to his thick skull.
clean the streets kill a ned
join the a.a.n army against neds
clean the streets kill a ned
join the a.a.n army against neds
by <---Azriel---> July 14, 2006
Neds, much to the contrary of common belief, are not purely found within the Glasgow area, but litter most parks and wooded areas of Scotland drinking "Buckfast" and other get-pissed-quick drinks. The word "ned" does not stand for "non-educated-delinquent" as nowadays, neds can range from the educated to the idiots. Mainly, they are idiots. Neds do wear tracksuits and trainers and caps tilted very high upwards and gold rings. The Female ned, however, can be identified in two forms, The Manly Nedette and the Nedette. The nedette can also be known as a "Slut" "whore" or "person wearing very few clothes and lots of gold jewlery". The Manly Nedette is a female who wears tracksuits and trainers and caps tilted very high upwards and gold rings. A common trademark of the ned is trackies tucked into socks.
by girl from Stirling August 07, 2006
Irritating guys who throw rocks at buses, wear 'pure sovvys'.
used to be found solely in glasgow, but are now found beating up goths even in Cockburn Street ( a goth mecca in Edinburgh). Come into games workshop and break peoples models.
used to be found solely in glasgow, but are now found beating up goths even in Cockburn Street ( a goth mecca in Edinburgh). Come into games workshop and break peoples models.
'you are a ned'
by Duncan January 14, 2004
The word ned is believed to stand for non-educated delinquant. They are basically violent scottish youths and in some cases adults. They are known to wear berghaus or tracksuits, though just wearing the clothes does not make a ned as the violence and arrogance must be present. Neds are usually quite racist and hate anyone who looks different or is from another gang. Ned is basically a trend of violence like its english equivalent the chav. There is some conffusion about neds being another name for the working class, this is not true as class does not determine violence.
(person walks by neds while talking to his friends)
ned: oi you ya cunt
person: huh?
ned: you fuckin acting wide
person: what?
ned: whatch it or I'll smash you
(person walks away with friends)
ned: ya fukin boostin ya cunt
(the ned and his ned friends chase after them and assault them. They may possibly use knifes or another weapon, at the end person will be badly hurt. The person's belongings at the time will be stolen along with his friends belongings).
ned: oi you ya cunt
person: huh?
ned: you fuckin acting wide
person: what?
ned: whatch it or I'll smash you
(person walks away with friends)
ned: ya fukin boostin ya cunt
(the ned and his ned friends chase after them and assault them. They may possibly use knifes or another weapon, at the end person will be badly hurt. The person's belongings at the time will be stolen along with his friends belongings).
by this_guy March 25, 2006