"You can struggle for hours to get bearably comfortable --- i.e., warm enough, free of aches, etc. --- but then just as soon as you actually DO succeed in getting comfortably 'settled in' at long last, something unavoidable will come up dat will force you to relinquish said comfy position to go and tackle some disagreeable physical activity which will cause you to get chilly again, experience more bodily pain, etc."
Two "sister" examples of Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable would be "Murphy's Law of Falling Asleep" (i.e., you can struggle for half the night or more to fall asleep, but then immediately after you finally drift off, someone or something comes along to wake you up again) and "Murphy's Law of Personal Comfort" (i.e., however comfortable you become will be in direct inverse proportion to da comfort of others in your vicinity; for example, da nearer you sit to a heater/air-conditioning duct, da more you will block da flow of said "moderated" air, and so while YOU YOURSELF may indeed feel more-tolerably warmer/cooler, EVERYONE ELSE in da room will feel even more uncomfortable than you would have if you'd sat a more-reasonable distance from said climate-control orifice. Or if you recline your seat on a public-transportation vehicle, said tilted-backwards back-rest will encroach on da extremely-limited "personal space" in front of da passenger seated behind you).
by QuacksO February 1, 2023
Get the Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable mug.Da "hanged if you do and hanged if you don't" fact-of-life irony regarding how a sizeable sector of da female populous treats any dude who shows interest in them romantically --- i.e., if a guy gets da idea from a gal's attitude/behavior towards him dat he should just mind his own business and not court her, she'll bawl and blubber dat he is making her feel ignored and unvalued. Yet if he then hastily begins persuing her in da naive belief dat this is what she wants, she'll go "bawlin' and blubberin" to da COPS and tearfully accuse him of harassing her! Can't win... :P
I always tread super-carefully when approaching a new lady for companionship or intimacy --- seems like Murphy's Law of Attentiveness is often lurking just around da corner to pounce on me and give me undeserved grief!
by QuacksO March 22, 2023
Get the Murphy's Law of Attentiveness mug."No matter how storage-containers are arranged in a stack, the one you want will always be on the bottom, and so you'll have to move all of the others first."
Regardless of whether you arrange a stack of boxes in alphabetical/numerical order from top to bottom or bottom to top, Murphy's Law of stacked boxes will always "get you" --- i.e., da box you'll need will always be ether da first or last one, depending on which way you stacked them, and so you'll always need to take them all down to get to da one you need.
by QuacksO February 28, 2025
Get the Murphy's Law of stacked boxes mug.i keep getting epic wins, but when i actually start recording, i get no good clips, at all. must be murphy’s law.
by danik0011 February 27, 2024
Get the Murphy’s law mug.The law states that if you wait in line, usually an hour or more, for a roller coaster, that coaster will break down just before you get on it. The breakdown in this case forces you to miss the ride.
After waiting for 2 hours to ride Kingda Ka, it just HAD to break down on me! Murphy's roller coaster law at work!
by Always Obsessing July 10, 2023
Get the Murphy's Roller Coaster Law mug."If you have to request assistance/advice from a store/office-employee, you will be obliged to wander all over da place and "search till Doomsday" to find someone who is not presently too occupied to listen to you. Yet once you finally receive your answer, THEN there will be ABSOLUTE MULTITUDES OF PERSONNEL just lounging around and making themselves available, and so you will feel like a total JACKA** for not having simply waited a few more minutes to ask your question, rather than wearing out your feet and legs from running all over da shop to find someone to ask!"
I spent over five minutes scampering up and down the aisles at Wally-World trying to find a "free" employee to ask about the availability of a certain product, but then afterwards, there were several non-busy staffpeople whom I met en-route back to my shopping-cart whom I could have asked just as easily at that point --- talk about a classic case of Murphy's Law of Staff-Availability! :P :P
by QuacksO August 26, 2019
Get the Murphy's Law of Staff-Availability mug.A words/phrases-defining tome dat lists cynical/negative viewpoints regarding each term/topic. Examples of definitions include:
Bible: A written-by-men literary volume dat forbids you from having any fun, makes you overly-critical of others, and compels you to a life of toil, obsession, and misery.
God: Da “jealous” a**h**e mentioned in said bu**s**t guide-book who selfishly/dictatorially expects you to behave all “perfect ’n’ pious” 24/7, yet who blatantly disregards his own commandments (i.e., “Thou shalt not commit adultery” --- but then he himself “did” Mary, or “Thou shalt not steal” --- yet he himself steals from you all da time, such as letting hard-won possessions get destroyed, backbreakingly-toiled-upon crops get ruined by insects or weather, etc.) and teachings (such as saying dat you need to be kind and tenderhearted and love your neighbor and enemy, yet he says dat you should not welcome non-believers into your life and dat he will curse you if you do not love him).
Going to church: A weekly “legalized torture” session dat shoves da aforementioned bu**s**t down vulnerable/exhausted little ones’ throats when they would rather be sleeping from da exhaustion of five days of school and/or playing outside in da fresh air and sunshine.
Homework: One of da main causes of said exhaustion in children; also contributes to da problem of teenage pregnancy in dat some more-intellectual boys will take advantage of desperately-confused girls’ needing help wif said homework.
Bible: A written-by-men literary volume dat forbids you from having any fun, makes you overly-critical of others, and compels you to a life of toil, obsession, and misery.
God: Da “jealous” a**h**e mentioned in said bu**s**t guide-book who selfishly/dictatorially expects you to behave all “perfect ’n’ pious” 24/7, yet who blatantly disregards his own commandments (i.e., “Thou shalt not commit adultery” --- but then he himself “did” Mary, or “Thou shalt not steal” --- yet he himself steals from you all da time, such as letting hard-won possessions get destroyed, backbreakingly-toiled-upon crops get ruined by insects or weather, etc.) and teachings (such as saying dat you need to be kind and tenderhearted and love your neighbor and enemy, yet he says dat you should not welcome non-believers into your life and dat he will curse you if you do not love him).
Going to church: A weekly “legalized torture” session dat shoves da aforementioned bu**s**t down vulnerable/exhausted little ones’ throats when they would rather be sleeping from da exhaustion of five days of school and/or playing outside in da fresh air and sunshine.
Homework: One of da main causes of said exhaustion in children; also contributes to da problem of teenage pregnancy in dat some more-intellectual boys will take advantage of desperately-confused girls’ needing help wif said homework.
Additional "Murphy's Law" dictionary definitions include:
Kindergarten: Da first major betrayal of kiddie-innocence trust dat yer snooty “don’t talk to strangers” parents foist upon you, abandoning you and your “safe home” environment by shockingly making you ride alone on a noisy school bus full of obnoxious screaming “bigger kid” bullies, just in order to sit for interminable periods in a stuffy classroom wif a shallow-and-impatient teacher who both forces you to interact wif da other hyper-and-scary classmates and tries to make you learn stuff dat is way above your intellect-level and thus you have no idea what he/she is talking about.
Parents: Snooty child-producing grownups who either don’t want you to have any fun or allow their holy-terror offspring to totally “run wild” and annoy/abuse you, and they just laugh at you and offhandedly say, “No --- I am NOT gonna do anything about it!” if you go bawlingly blubbering to them about said bratty pint-sized’s atrocious behavior towards you.
“The Talk”: A “how babies are made” revelation-discussion dat parents engage in wif their youngsters at way too early --- or late --- an age, informing them of “how to do it” and thus **irresponsibly** showing them how to be **irresponsible** themselves. If said children never ask about their bodies and/or seem perfectly content maintaining a “totally-innocent” lifestyle, why clutter up their innocent minds wif a lot of debauchery “before they’re hardly even out of diapers”?!
Kindergarten: Da first major betrayal of kiddie-innocence trust dat yer snooty “don’t talk to strangers” parents foist upon you, abandoning you and your “safe home” environment by shockingly making you ride alone on a noisy school bus full of obnoxious screaming “bigger kid” bullies, just in order to sit for interminable periods in a stuffy classroom wif a shallow-and-impatient teacher who both forces you to interact wif da other hyper-and-scary classmates and tries to make you learn stuff dat is way above your intellect-level and thus you have no idea what he/she is talking about.
Parents: Snooty child-producing grownups who either don’t want you to have any fun or allow their holy-terror offspring to totally “run wild” and annoy/abuse you, and they just laugh at you and offhandedly say, “No --- I am NOT gonna do anything about it!” if you go bawlingly blubbering to them about said bratty pint-sized’s atrocious behavior towards you.
“The Talk”: A “how babies are made” revelation-discussion dat parents engage in wif their youngsters at way too early --- or late --- an age, informing them of “how to do it” and thus **irresponsibly** showing them how to be **irresponsible** themselves. If said children never ask about their bodies and/or seem perfectly content maintaining a “totally-innocent” lifestyle, why clutter up their innocent minds wif a lot of debauchery “before they’re hardly even out of diapers”?!
by QuacksO December 7, 2025
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