Farmer's Nail

Farmer's Nail is to have one or more dirty finger nails and the dirt appears to be typical garden variety "dirt" or potting soil under the nails. However, Farmer's Nail is not regular dirt or soil but is actually feces which is accumulated under one or more finger nails as a direct result of either intentional fingering of a dirty shit plugged anus during a sexual act or from having one or more fingers slip through the toilet paper while wiping one's ass and getting ass dirt or fecal matter under the nails. Having Farmer's Nail does not mean that one did not wash their hands after an anal fingering or after slippage during a wipe job, just that one did not clean the feces from under their nails at the time of the wash job as they may not have known it was present. In most, but not all instances of Farmer's Nail, it is not left under the nail intentionally and is simply an oversight during the clean up process.

Farmer's Nail is also known as Mechanic's Nail which is more frequently used in the automotive industry.

Carl: Hi Gary. What have you been up to? From the looks of those fingers I would say you have been working in the garden this morning?
Gary: No I have not been in the yard working today. (Looking at nails) Oh No Bro. I had the worst Louisiana Tail Drop earlier this morning and made an absolute mess. I was wiping my sharted ass with both hands and my fingers kept slipping through the wet shat paper. Guess it got under the nails.
Carl: That is some nasty shit brahh! You got the worst case of Farmer's Nail I have ever seen. Go get a toothpick or a nail file and dig that shit out. Nasty.

by Eaton Holgoode April 13, 2014

Claw the platypus's nail and shove it up the ass

you've just got out of school and you are ready to pump up the summer vibe ie: fortnight, you're ready to rock n roll and claw the platypus's nail and shove it up the ass. Really hyped about something.

Teacher: Alright kids, have fun in your summer
Kid to friend: I'm ready to claw the platypus's nail and shove it up the ass.

by lovepenguinsandlife February 22, 2019

She's a Nail it

A female who is always ready to "Nail It" with the next young stud that comes along. Usually an older female.

Me: "Hey man, what's up with that new girl that's been coming around, what's she like?"
Them: "She's a Nail it. You're too old to be her next target, she likes them alot younger."

by Ra Sol 777 April 14, 2023

To nail someone

To have sex with someone.

I really need to nail someone tonight, it's been so long my balls are the size of oranges!

or

Yes! I finally nailed Jane last night!

by Saffer77 April 13, 2014

Toe Nail Sacrifice

When a person sacrifices a toe nail in order to save the life/lives of a person/people who may or may not have been forced in to a very hostile hostage situation, usually resulting in the prevention of thousands of fatalities and/or a significant increase of activity in the illegal ivory trade.

Andrew: "Come on man, you know this is wrong, just stop this madness just let them go, I'll do anything!"

Terrorist:"You know there's only one thing you can do Andy, you wanna be a hero well it's time to show your true colours!"

Andrew:"You dont mean........."

Terrorist:"Yeah Andy boy I mean it and i mean it good its time for a TOE NAIL SACRIFICE!!!"

Hostages:"Thankyou Andrew!"

by MudOnMe November 5, 2011

nail salon

1) A place a woman will go once a week to spend all your money on a worthless service.

2) A scam set up by Vietnamese immigrants to bilk money out of idiot women.

1) "I'm going to get my nails done at the nail salon."

2) "I can't believe she paid us 30 dollars to clean and polish her finger nails."

by DesPERRYado April 11, 2005

Nail Syndrome

When one has a big dick but doesn't know how to use it.

ME: That poor Kyle never gets any

BONI: Yea, he has a huge dick too...

ME: He must have a case of the Nail Syndrome

by Jizmo Beach June 16, 2010