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duck wearing a wonderbra 

A duck wearing a wonderbra refers to a very unlikely event.
My going out with you is as likely as a duck wearing a wonderbra.

worderer (as in word murderer)

(noun) A mindless, thoughtless piece of shit who has no regard for the English language and demonstrates it frequently by leaving off modifiers such as adverbs and other word endings rendering them incomplete in an effort to sound cool or "hip". Worderer also applies to assholes who misuse or substitute and replace words that sound similar, also known as 'Bunkerisms' as in Archie Bunker from the 1970s CBS hit sitcom.
Example 1
Steve: Hey man, did you see the meteor shower last night?
John: No. I slept through it.
Steve: That's too bad. It was incred, Bro; beyond spectac. The whole show was a real sight to behold. Quite invig. Don't I speak like a douche?
John: Why, yes you do! You're such a worderer (as in word murderer).

Example 2
When the man in the restaurant began to choke, AnnaMaria shouted, "Does anyone know the Heineken remover?"

wonderbread 

Being generic, bland, soul-less, mainstream, or distasteful in nature in order to appeal to wider, often mindless audiences.
"Starbucks is just too wonderbread for me to be interested in going there. All the girls that go there prove that."

mind-wanderer

mind wanderer
n: a person who travels in their mind; a traveler who believes in their dreams
I am a mind-wanderer
mind-wanderer by mindwanderer90 November 8, 2013

wanderer 

A person who travels aimlessly; a travler
He is a longtime seaman, a rootless wanderer
wanderer by Anonymous person..... December 19, 2015

wonderbra 

The bra that gives horny men false hope by giving flat-chested women impressive-looking breasts and cleavage.
The reason they call it the wonderbra is because men wonder where the titties went when the bra comes off.
wonderbra by bigtones July 12, 2007