There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life 

The act of roasting physics teachers and messaging the whole sixth form about why attending a banter fest during a global pandemic is an inadvisable thing to do.

Physics teacher: Hey guys I organised a banter fest for you next Monday. It'll be really fun!
Sensible person: There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life
Physics teacher: Oh I'm sorry I didn't...
Sensible person: There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life
Physics teacher: *Leaves school to go live in a remote Siberian village*

There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life by discordmyiscord August 13, 2020

definitewee 

The way black people (such as Kern) say, or try to say, definitely. It is very fun to say, and can be pronounced def-in-it-we.

I definitewee didn't take da cookies playboi!

I definitewee did not tell you to sell.

I would definitewee put that booty in my face.

definitewee by Playboi March 1, 2008

definitely forreal 

Phrase used to confirm that something is completely legit and totally believeable. Also means "I agree".

Angelique: Dude did you see that guy?
Allison: Yeah, he was so freakin' cute.
Angelique: Right, I'd hit that..twice.
Allison: definitely forreal.

definitely forreal by YouKnowWhatItIs69 March 27, 2011

definitely false 

When something is wrong, to the extreme.

"I do not suck at life, you are most definitely false."

definitely false by Bevy September 28, 2006

A Definite No

A Definite No is when like something scares you, grosses you out, or pisses you off to the point of no return.

This guy threw up by my foot and I'm just like that's a definite no, I'm completely done with everything right now.

A Definite No by How the Misery begins January 19, 2014

most definitely 

A redundant modification of the word definitely, used by inarticulant athletes (oops, redundantcy alert) during television interviews to describe their agreement with a premise or event that is beyond definite, as if definite meant probably. Most probably used to convince viewers of their almost definite plan to finish the last 3 1/2 years of their college education, after scoring millions of bucks as a stud.

"We most definitely lost the game, since we only scored 10 points, and they hung 38 on us" (because sometimes, you win even though out-scored?).

most definitely by Greg54 November 16, 2005

definitely maybe

An annoying phrase that Andrew uses daily to describe something that may occur.

Me: "Hey Andrew, are you going to that party Saturday night?"
Andrew: "Definitely maybe."

definitely maybe by Sunxocean March 10, 2009