A fictitious yoga pose which requires incredible flexibility where a person shoves their head up their own ass. Used mainly toward arrogant yoga aficionados.

Girl: Yoga is so good for your heart and soul; it's way better than lifting weights.
Guy: Oh yeah? Well, why don't you go perform the backwards tortoise then, bitch.

backwards tortoise by mrsteveo March 24, 2009

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The Gaming Tortoise

The person in your friend group that you always have to wait for when you're all playing games together because they are stuck on a level.

Bob: C'mon guys lets hurry this up!
Bill: *gets caught up*
Nathan: GUYS IM STUCK
Johnathan: *gets caught up* Hurry up! You're 100% The Gaming Tortoise of our friend group!

The Gaming Tortoise by McDonaldsOfAustralia February 5, 2023

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Tortoise Launcher

Where defacating takes place into the inner workings of a high-powered vacuum. The vacuum is then set in the reverse operation to ejaculate your steaming excraments at very high velocity into the face of your loved one.

Dude, Wilbur totally screwed up my vacuum when he gave your girlfriend one wicked Tortoise Launcher.

Tortoise Launcher by Wyatt Erp January 21, 2010

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curious tortoise

When you need to go to the toilet so badly that the poo is starting to make an appearance from your bum hole.

Usually accompanied by walking around on tippy-toes and gritting your teeth.

Oh man! Where's the nearest restrooms? I've got a curious tortoise!!

curious tortoise by doc brown June 18, 2007

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