Skip to main content

SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi 

Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi mug front
Get the SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi mug.
See more merch

smokin chokin 

When you hit that dro and its hittin thick and you start coughin like a mark.
Yung Eddye hit that chron and was smokin chokin like a mark ass.
smokin chokin by CHONTO August 18, 2016

Baby Chokin on a Lettuce 

A 30 second song by song artist/youtuber Mole Nugget.
Mole Nugget wrote Baby Chokin on a Lettuce.

Choking Casper 

A means of self pleasure attempted only by the bravest of males. A masturbatory technique by which 2-4 tissues are overlapped to form a soft sheath over the head and shaft of the penis, thus resembling a ghost. The male proceeds to "choke his chicken" using the Kleenex condom as both a barrier between his hand and penile skin as well as a reservoir for the resulting ejaculate. For best results, tissues with aloe should be used in order to reduce friction and risk of bleeding.
Kyle: I stumbled upon the hottest lesbian porn on tv last night.
Paul: Did you blow your load all over the place or did you contain it with the Choking Casper?
Kyle: Let's just say Casper wasn't such a friendly ghost when I was done. I ended up with some serious rug burn.

Cookin' Lyte

when you're saucing up a girl , but you gotta keep it lowkey
" Aye yo i'm cookin' lyte with sharkquisha , keep it on the DL"
Cookin' Lyte by chipskylark July 30, 2016

choking the nun 

Euphemism for male masturbation. Coined (or at least made popular) by Ryan Stiles on Whose Line Is It Anyway.
"Sorry I'm late. I was choking the nun...if you know what I mean."

choking your chicken

Choking your chicken is whacking yo wienie homie!
Dang, Gabe have you ever been caught in the closet choking your chicken. I have and my Mom is taking me to a shrink tomorrow to see if I'm a perv.