jehovah's wittness 

1a) A cult like socity, that does not celebrate the following hoildays:

1b) 1.christmas! ( omg are you serious)

2.thanksgiving! (code name: turkey: because they belive we worship the turkey!! again OMG!)

3.halloween! ( Demons!! Demons!!)

4.Birthdays!! (yes birthdays!! so whats are still 7 dude it's been 30 years!!?!)( don't do birthdays because someone died on that day!!)

5.any and all government hoildays! ( so on laborday your ass better be at work!!)

2) JW's also are known for knocking on your door!, and trying to ""save your soul"" (on saturdays) and PO people on there day off!! they hand out pamphlets on the ending of the world. (what a way to start your day.)

3) CULT!

4) also a from of hide-n-go seek!!( HIDE there coming down the street!!)

steve: shhh.... you hear that!

paul: yeah!...what is that!

steve:...... O shit!! its those jehovah's wittness! kill the lights!!

paul: damnit i think they saw me!

steve: paul i'm scared

JW's:*knock knock knock* we saw yo ass. we aint leavin till you open the door!!

both: NOOO!!!

jehovah's wittness by paul y steve November 28, 2009

jehovah witnessing 

the act of pissing every person you come in contact with off.

When the Jehovahs went Jehovah Witnessing, they pissed everyone they came in contact with off.alot alot alot.

jehovah witnessing by Mardi and Gras February 20, 2009

jehovahs witness 

"Jehovah's Witness" without an apostrophe

Somebody else here added a definition for "jehovahs witness", thus creating this new page, instead of adding to the already existing "Jehovah's Witness" or "Jehovah's Witnesses" definitions.

jehovahs witness by Bill M. August 27, 2004

Jehovah's Witnesses 

The 144k sequestered Witnesses testifying in the longest trial in history. They're not supposed to talk about the trial but can't help themselves and won't shut up about it. At the kangaroo courthouse the defense will Cross-examine the hostile Witnesses and then call the Methodists to the stand to discredit all of Jehovah's Witnesses. Whether Kato Kailin is to testify is still uncertain, nonetheless, the trial is expected to wrap up around the year 3030 with Judgement Day sometime in April, however the JW legal team will almost certainly appeal the decision and demand a re-trial.

Headline: "Christmas Cancelled Again!! Persecution to call Jehovah's Witness #133,411 next week." also: "Jehovah's Witnesses Watchtower leaflet discovered in chambers - Judge Judy to Step Down"

In Other News: "Muslim Jihadi explodes onto the scene, siezes the lead in the race to heaven - #144,001 enters Pearly Gates as Donny & Marie's bicycles are damaged by mysterious bombing excommunicating them out of the race - Utah outraged."

Politics Today: "Burning Bush singes eyebrows during pagan oil and fire ritual and false idol worship of wealth and power"

Jehovah's Witnesses by Russ & Linda August 23, 2007

Jehovah's Witnesses 

people dedicated to God to do his will, or rather are led to believe that they are doing gods will

"The Jehovah's Witnesses came to the door today I just told them that I wasnt interested and they kept talking so I shut the door, but they refused to let me by placing their foot in the door, So I asked them to leave before I called the police to have them removed"

Jehovah's Witnesses by red-suns-driver April 10, 2007

jehovahs wasness 

someone who used to be, but no longer is a practicing jehovahs witness.

he used to bang on doors, but no more, that dude's a jehovahs wasness.

jehovahs wasness by cowboyjunkie May 19, 2008

Jehovah 

The name of God. Saying it warrants getting stoned to death by an angry mob consisting of women pretending to be men.

Now look! NO ONE is to stone ANYONE until I blow this whistle! Understand!? Even if- And I want to make this absolutely clear- even if they do say, "Jehovah!"
*is promptly stoned to death by mob of angry women pretending to be men*

Jehovah by Intelligence001 January 29, 2019