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I Sent My Chief Negotiator

A phrase; used to imply that you sent a friend to an important meeting, date, interview, Settlement Conference, trial, exam, etc. in your stead (i.e. on your behalf).
Professor Lambeau: "What happened at the McNeil meeting?"

Will: "Oh, I couldn't go...so, I sent my Chief Negotiator."

Professor Lambeau: "On your own time you can do whatever you like, Will, but when I set up a meeting with my...with my associates, and you don't show up, it reflects poorly on me."
Will: "All right. Well then don't set up any more meetin's."

Shrewd negotiator

The definition of what Ed Bolian does for a living. Basically just lowballing exotic cars and flipping them later.
“I talked to her and offered $30k for the Lambo but, she wanted $75k. She was an shrewd negotiator so we met right in the middle at $30k.” - Ed Bolian, The Professional Shrewd Negotiator
Shrewd negotiator by what122 May 16, 2019

Hostage Negotiation 

Having to use the bathroom in the absolute worst way, but either a) you're constipated or b) you have performance anxiety for whatever reason.
Dude, I was just in stall 3, and I had to do some major Hostage Negotiation in there... I was a little embarrassed, 'cause Lenny the VP was in the next stall. Although HE had no problem releasing the hostages.

negrotiate 

haggling over the price of an item that you can not afford no matter what the price
That man was trying to negrotiate on a waterfront house and he doesn't even have a job
negrotiate by upset realtor November 18, 2006

Secret Diplomatic Negotiations 

"Secret Diplomatic Negotiations" is a comical euphemism for anal sex. It was coined over at www.apennyforlenny.com, based on a Jeopardy clue.

The clue was from the category "BACK" TO SCHOOL. It was:

“SECRET DIPLOMATIC NEGOTIATIONS ARE SAID TO GO THROUGH THIS”

The answer was "WHAT IS THE BACKDOOR?"
"Could I interest any of you ladies in some Secret Diplomatic Negotiations?"

"Yeah, me and Becky Diplomatically Negotiated in Secret all night long."

"If you're ever in prison, watch out for the Secret Diplomatic Negotiations that happen in the shower."

Negotiating with terrorists 

The act of engaging another in an argument that is so self-evidently preposterous that doing so provides dangerous validation to the other party. Usually refers to arguments with bipolar ex-girl or boyfriends, often with a history of employment in various clothing-optional adult entertainment industries.
#1: Stripper Sara cornered me at the bar & started screaming at me again about her missing John Mayer CDs. She knows I would rather tear out my eardrums & set them on fire than listen to that douche.
#2: What did you do?
#3: I walked away. Anything else is negotiating with terrorists.