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exaggerator calibrator 

a mental device used to make a notorious exaggerator's stories more truthful.
As she spun her bloated yarn my exaggerator calibrator was working overtime trying to drag the rocketing leviathon back to earth.

Dance floor Calibrator 

A man of age that possesses the skill and determination to inspect and calibrate each corner of the dance floor various musical numbers.
Dance floor Calibrator by Comleo January 18, 2011

‘Celebratory’ Assembly

Definition---
An assembly with which to celebrate students ‘achievements’ such as birthdays. –held every Friday afternoon- similar to Mass, but is hosted by a manwho regards himself on par with God like stature, along with a long-haired Science co-ordinator, who, funnily enough, is a bitch; an assembly in which a regimented clap is allowed for a controlled burst of time.
Example---
HT: So let’s have on e round of a happy birthday rendition.
{Terrible piano playing ensues, coupled with the vocals to ‘Happy Birthday’ from children… followed by clapping.}
HT: Right! Nathan! You can go sit outside my office, there was no need for that extra-clap of an outburst.
Teacher: Once again, an excellent and most celebratory, ‘Celebratory’ Assembly

Calibrations 

Either an activity that must be done constantly, or something you bring up when you want to subtly tell someone to go fuck themselves.
Shepard: "Hey Garrus, got a minute?"
Garrus: "Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations."

Celebratory Crouching 

An action used commonly in the Halo video game series mainly during online multiplayer player play. Celebratory Crouching is normally seen as several pelvic thrusts/crouching motions into a recently killed halo player to humiliate ones death or to celebrate an unbelievable kill. While many find the action insulting during the game as it is oftenly confused with T-Bagging however it is perfectly acceptable to celebratory crouch on ones face or body in the game.
Dude look at me CELEBRATORY CROUCHING on this guys face!

calibrate 

phrase a criticism in a way that keeps you out of trouble
President Obama wishes he had "calibrated" his criticism of the Cambridge Police Department, so that he hadn't come under so much heat for the way he phrased it originally.
calibrate by MalibuGA July 27, 2009