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check the quality of the turf

(verb.) To examine the quality of a woman's lotus patch.
'you hooked up with a burner didn't you?'
'...thought she was nice, said it was her first time...'
'you've always got to check the quality of the turf before you step out onto the field.'

Off the turf 

1. When a turf horse race is moved to the dirt because of rainfall.

2. Also known as the New York Racing Association (NYRA)
Hurricane Swifty brought so much rain the Grade 1 Dave Weaver was moved "Off the Turf."
Off the turf by C mo Horses December 9, 2018

The Churf ‘n Turf 

When a male fakes an orgasm to get out of an uncomfortable situation.
I was about halfway through smashing when it dawned on me that she looked like my mom. I pulled the Churf ‘n Turf and dipped out.

The Greatest Show On Turf 

Nickname given by the media to the 1999 St. Louis Rams. Quite possibly the most potent offensive attack in NFL history.
"Warner back to pass, he throws a long bomb, and the catch is made in the end zone by Torry Holt!!! The Greatest Show On Turf is at it again!"

I may be from the bog but Im not turf 

Refers to people living in the Irish countryside or just outside Dublin. Sarcasm - Im not thick
Are you serious? I may be from the bog but Im not turf