the carnal reserve bank

Analogous to the federal reserve bank except for the spank bank. The carnal reserve bank is the central location in the brain where all pornographic,erotic and sexy images,scenarios and fantasies are stored for spanking stimulation.Where as the spank bank stores recent and favorite images,the carnal reserve bank keeps older or less frequently used images.

I got tired of whacking off to the same old fantasy so I summoned up some different material from the carnal reserve bank.

by wolfbait51 September 28, 2011

diet soda offset

The curious way some people will order a 2000 calorie,grease laden,artery blocking,"obesity-in-a-bag" fast food meals and order a diet soda as if they were really concerned about healthy eating and the soda will magically negate all the fat grams.

I ordered the Maple Bacon Ice Cream Sundae at Denny's along with a diet soda offset.

by wolfbait51 May 21, 2011

fart recoil

The reaction of innocent "by-sniffers" to a rancid fart. Can range from a squirrel-like nose twitch to physically recoiling backward and even up to spewing chunks.This phenomenon has even been observed in the family dog where it covers its muzzle with its paw or buries its nose in a couch cushion

I love to see the fart recoil when little old ladies hit "the cloud".

by wolfbait51 December 12, 2011

Pop Tart Napalm

When you eagerly bite into a Pop Tart just out of the toaster that hasn't cooled sufficiently and the delicious fruit filling burns the shit out of your lips and mouth and sticks to the tender oral tissues like hot glue.

Owwwww! Fuck! I just got blisters in my mouth from that devilish Pop Tart Napalm!!

by wolfbait51 September 25, 2011

goose neck dick

A dick that is hard on both ends and bendy in the middle.Almost always a result of too much booze or dope.

I really wanted to fuck that girl but I had a bad case of goose neck dick

by wolfbait51 May 17, 2011

rusty door hinge fart

A long,protracted fart that sounds like a squeaky door in a haunted house

That rusty door hinge fart gave me the chills.

by wolfbait51 May 28, 2011

the twin river quandary

When a male's urine stream divides into two widely separated streams and no amount of penile manipulation is able to direct both streams into the toilet bowl.The most frequent cause of this phenomenon is the piss slit becoming stuck together in the middle with smeg,chewing gum unejected,congealed jizz.

I stumbled into the bathroom,half asleep,began to urinate and notice both feet were getting wet.I was in the middle of the twin river quandary.

by wolfbait51 May 15, 2011