theWestHamfan's definitions

flied lice

cheap and nasty fried rice

Ho says "my special flied lice, my very special flied lice and my very very extra special flied lice are all my much improved flied lice. Or there is just my flied lice."

by theWestHamfan November 10, 2003

Essex girl

some of the most beautiful girls in the world come from essex

essex girl: "I think i've got concussion."
paramedic: "How many fingers have i got up?"
essex girl: "oh! don't say i'm paralysed too."

by theWestHamfan November 19, 2003

incuntinent

a medical condition causing one to urinate instead of ejaculate during sexual intercourse

spicer was getting really fed up with dave. she thought he was taking the piss not realising he was incuntinent

by theWestHamfan December 25, 2003

cock splint

penis splint; usually consisting of four spatulas arranged equidistant and parallel to the penis, thus encompassing it. this is held in place with a binding of clear plaster.

on her wedding night victoria threw aside the covers and said, "look david, this bearded oyster has never been seen or touched by a man." "that's nothing" replied david, opening his dressing gown to expose his cock splint, "look, this is still boxed!."

by theWestHamfan November 12, 2003

dickie fender

a penis shield

"he's boxing tonight, he's got 'is dickie fender on"

by theWestHamfan October 22, 2003

conger eel

a penis that never becomes fully erect, even during ejaculation

brittney was VERY dissapointed. she expected a throbber and he only had a conger eel

by theWestHamfan November 17, 2003

I'll keep my eye out for you

to look out for a person

the cheapest sex trev could find was One-eyed-Hilda who would charge him 50p for a quickie in the old eye-socket.
"'bye trev" cackled the old girl "I'll keep my eye out for you."

by theWestHamfan December 27, 2003