Penzance

The home of drunken pirates.

Penzance is full of pirates my luvverr

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

St Ives

A seaside town in deepest Cornwall. Permanently blocked up with traffic at all times of the year, it is full of drunken tourists.

St Ives is where people queue up for 4 hours just to use the public toilets

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

Taunton

A depressing and pointless town in Somerset, UK.

All the shops are closing down in the town centre, leaving Taunton looking like a ghost town.

Taunton is a hellhole

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

Haywards Heath

The armpit of West Sussex.

Formerly a well respected, safe and happy town, it is now the home of drug dealers, chavs, snobs and rough council estates like Bentswood.

Haywards Heath was a nice town years ago man, now it's the biggest shithole going.

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

Chard

A small town in Somerset, England.

Formerly the most dangerous town in England for its size, it is known for its pub fights and mass unemployment.

Going for a night out in Chard is one of the riskiest things a human can do in their life.

Dean: Wanna have a night out in Chard?
Matt: Chard, as in, the roughest town in England?
Dean: Oh. Perhaps not then.

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

Torquay

Formerly the richest town in England, Torquay is now part of the most deprived union authority in all of South-West England, Torbay.
The town centre has hundreds of mobile phone repair stores.
One of the highest rates of teen pregnancy in the UK.
75% of the population are drug addicts, alcoholics or old people.

Torquay has turned into the Blackpool of Devon.

by smitho111 October 01, 2023

Cullompton

A strange little town in the middle of nowhere swarming with chavs.

Has a huge Tesco, and is permanently blocked up with traffic. It also has a McDonalds.

Cullompton is only known for its McDonald's

by smitho111 October 01, 2023