smendler's definitions

revenure

(Portmanteau, revenue + manure) When your sales figures are in the toilet.

"Well, Jim, how was our revenue last month?"

"More like revenure, actually."

by smendler August 18, 2013

cootie catcher

an origami "fortune-teller" device made out of paper - a favorite among girls around 6th grade or so, but popular with all ages and genders.

To make a cootie-catcher, fold a paper square to form four "pyramids". The player opens and closes the pyramids with their index fingers and thumb, revealing different things (usually numbers or colors) on the inside surfaces.

The person who is having their "fortune" told chooses once, twice, or three times, and then the paper is unfolded to reveal a "fortune"

Jessica: "Wanna play cootie catcher? It'll tell you who your boyfriend is!"

Suzie: "Okay!"

Jessica: "Pick a number."

Suzie: "Okay- um - 4. Now - Red. Now 6. (unfolds cootie catcher message) Eeuuwww - I do NOT like Timmy Jones! Yuck!"

by smendler December 10, 2009

conserfs

Economically challenged citizens who support conservative causes, despite the fact that doing so is against their economic self-interest.

"Didja see all those conserfs at their 9/12 march?"

by smendler September 22, 2009

DNB

"Damn Near Blind"; not technically blind, but visually challenged enough to be unable to do essential things; usually referring to one's state without one's eyeglasses

Jack: "What's the matter, Ted?" Ted: "Oh, I have to drive to work, I can't find my glasses, and without them I'm DNB!"

by smendler May 24, 2010

famesque

Famous simply for "being famous."

"Sienna Miller is not famous. She is famesque. " - Amy Argetsinger, Washington Post, 8/10/2009

by smendler August 11, 2009

belligerism

The opposite of pacifism; the belief that war is a good thing, and there should be more of it.

"General Patton was a firm believer in belligerism."

by smendler July 29, 2009

wargasm

The ecstatic rush of adrenaline and testosterone experienced by warmongers, militarists, and belligerists at the beginning of a long-anticipated armed conflict.

"If Israel attacks Iran, John Bolton will have such a wargasm that his head might explode."

by smendler July 29, 2009