sambarnes's definitions

melolatry

An overzealous customer loyalty to Apple or their products such as the iMac, iPhone, or iPod. from greek melon (apple) and latria (worship) analogous to idolatry. One who engages in melolatry is called a melolator, or iJerk if they are particularly vocal about their distaste for Windows and its users. Not everyone who preferres mac over windows is a melolator, however.

With Apple's slick marketing campaigns and stylish hardware, it's easy to fall into melolatry if you're not careful.

by sambarnes January 2, 2010

presbylutheranism

full name: the western branch of American reform Presbylutheranism. The protestant denomination which the Simpsons as well as most other Springfieldianites belong to. The term is employed by Catholics to poke fun at the tendency of protestant denominations to multiply exponentially, and to highlight these denominations' homogeneity compared to the ancient tradition of the Apostolic Churches both Western and Eastern.

I attend St. Basil's, but all my friends are protestant... I don't know what denomination, presbylutheranism, I guess, they all look the same to me.

by sambarnes February 11, 2008

crotch

(verb) to grip or hold something with the inner thighs while sitting in order to leave one's hands free. This is almost always done in a vehicle with a fast food item, such as a beverage or carton of fries.

We're out of cup holders; looks like I'll have to crotch my root beer.

by sambarnes February 16, 2008

German Shepherd

A nickname for pope Benedict XVI. Along with other terms such as papa ratzi, B16, and papa ben, this phrase may be considered either endearing or offensive, depending upon whether the speaker is a practicing Catholic or not. (similar to the N word among Blacks). German shepherd is a pun on the pope's German background and his role as shepherd of the Christian church, and it plays on the practice of some members of the media calling him a rottweiler during his days as head of the CDF.

God bless our German shepherd!

by sambarnes February 16, 2008

college diet

A diet that consists in approximately one meal a day. This meal is often of little or no nutritional value, and may be fast food or even a bag of chips from a vending machine, eaten while sitting in class waiting for the prof to arrive.

The college diet can be employed for a number of reasons, chief among these are a lack of funds with which to purchase food, or a lack of time in which to prepare and eat a balanced meal. Lack of desire or perceived need to eat because of side effects from ADD medicine or other sources is also a cause.

Weight loss is inevitable when the college diet is combined with the natural daily exercise one gets from walking from class to class carrying a heavy backpack.

I have no time to eat in college; I'm on the college diet.

by sambarnes February 24, 2008

cynophagy

(noun) The act or practice of eating dog flesh. Generally considered taboo in most western countries, cynophagy is accepted in eastern and south-east Asia.

I went to a Korean place last night, and I ordered something that turned out to be dog. Cynophagy seems OK to me, it tasted great with rice and pepper sauce.

by sambarnes February 28, 2008

cynophile

(noun) a dog fancier. Cynophiles often participate in dog shows and dog sports. They may prefer owning purebred dogs who have a pedigree, rather than adopting mongrels from shelters, but this is by no means always true. They may be annoyingly obsessive about their dogs, spending exorbitant amounts of money on them, or may simply consider dogs ideal companions.

My friend is a real cynophile; he takes his dog to compete in conformation shows, the kind they show on Animal Planet.

by sambarnes February 28, 2008