one-a-day

to masturbate.

Can be used as a noun or verb.

Based on the results from the healthystrokes.com survey which reports the average man masturbates 7.2 times per week, or just about one-a-day.
"Sorry I took so long in the shower, I had to do my one-a-day"

"I just one-a-dayed all over the keyboard, anyone know how to clean that up?"

Jack: "Hey dude, why are you so whiny today?"
Jim: "I know, I'm so stressed out"
Jack: "Did you one-a-day yet?"
Jim: "Not yet! BRB ;)"
by reddan69 February 09, 2012
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Pee Pee Powerwashing

verb: using the pee pee powerwasher (your penis) to powerwash the toilet bowl after someone drops plops leaving a streaky shitty toilet bowl.
At the party, Dave murdered a brown snake and left it in the toilet. Dan came in after, vomited in the toilet then flushed it down. However Dave's shit streaks were stuck on the bowl. So Dan whipped out his pee pee powerwasher and did some Pee Pee Powerwashing!
by RedDan69 April 03, 2011
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Philadelphia New Moon

The act of smearing feces (your own or a friends) all over your ass cheeks until your white pasty butt now appears completely black. Then proceed to moon an unsuspecting person. The shit-covered ass appears at first glance to be not the typical full moon, but a dark new moon.

*If a person is truly creative, they can use varying amounts of poo to recreate all phases of the moon (New, waxing crescent 1st quarter, waxing gibbous, full, waning gibbous, 3rd quarter, waning crescent, and new)
a cop is sitting outside of Dunkin Donuts and looks up when a car driving by honks.

"hey copper, check this out!" the driver motions to the passenger in the back who put his shit covered ass out the window.

"Oh damn, Tell your black friend that he's gonna pay for that!"

"My friend isn't black, silly! You just got the Philadelphia New Moon!"

"Eww Gross!" the cop shakes his night stick angrily!
by RedDan69 April 22, 2011
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Release the Oompa Loompas

1. v. to unsnap a woman's bra, thus freeing the beautiful milk-maids (i.e. Oompa Loompas) from captivity.

2. v. to infiltrate the most secure area inside the Pentagon and free the 100 midgets that are currently held hostage. An attempt was made nearly 10 years ago but Al-Quaeda covered it up with urging from the president by crashing a plane. Top government officials will deny the existence of a captive Loompaland inside the Pentagon used for their enjoyment. However, it does exist and they need to be freed!
1. That chick is so corn, I can't wait til I can Release the Oompa Loompas!

2. Yo man I came up with a plan to Release the Oompa Loompas, can you help?

Sure, I know those little fellas need our help, I heard that they have them locked in a baby playpen!
by RedDan69 January 26, 2011
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condomints

noun. Condom + Mints = condomints. A play on the word condiment.

condom flavored mints
or
mint flavored condoms
I ate a whole bunch of condomints last night and now I feel sick! :(
by RedDan69 March 22, 2011
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Oreo Creampie Surprise

Find a black chick with really dark pussy lips. Add the cream filling and have her lay on her side so the lips and the cream look like an oreo cookie. While she is catching her breath after what obviously was the best 40 second long sex session of her life, you quickly put on your best Steve Urkel clothing (suspenders with hiked up pants, cheesy shirt, and big glasses). Get her attention, point to her oreo creampie and exclaim in a high pitched voice, "Did I do That?!?"
My girl and I just got done watching that lame show, Family Matters, so I had to give her the classic oreo creampie surprise! Her dark lips and my white cock snot really looked like an oreo!

well done!
by RedDan69 February 26, 2011
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