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RedDan69's definitions

Goal Pants

n. A pair of pants that are too small for the owner, but had once been the correct size. The owner insists on keeping the pants and making it a goal to become the same size they once were and thus fit into the pants. After many failed attempts, the goal size may be attained. However two problems usually arise: the goal pants are out of style (usually 10 or more years old) OR the owner proudly wears the pants for a day or two and then celebrates by eating something fattening, like the baconator and their fit lifestyle fades away and they begin to relapse into the round, tubby, person they will always be.
my girlfriend says that she is gonna fit into these pants again (holds up some tiny ass pants)

Damn!!!!! they are tiny, when's the last time that beefy girl wore those?

When she was three!

Now thats some goal pants!
by RedDan69 February 26, 2011
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Flaming Butt Monkey

noun: A cute name for an exuberant homosexual male.
Tom: Let's go hang out at Jerry's place.

Anne: Who is Jerry?

Tom: He's a Flaming Butt Monkey!

Anne: Aww, how cute, I'll be there in 10.
by RedDan69 March 28, 2011
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The Al Roker

n. slang term/ street name for gastric bypass surgery

Based on Al Roker's publicized weight loss surgery and dramatic weight loss.
Unhappy husband: Man my wife is fat and just keeps on eating, I think i should get a new one.

Smart Friend: No dude, she still cool, get her The Al Roker and you guys will be doing the Idaho Dartboard in no time!

Unhappy Husband: Thanks for the tip!

Smart Friend: Remember its never just the tip
by RedDan69 March 12, 2011
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Pennsylvania Pornographic Surprise

Conditions/preceding events:
A Male lives at home with his parents
He proceeds to lock himself in his room to watch porn
The porn is turned up to a high decibel
The parents then begin to wonder what the heck is happening in their son's bedroom
While masturbating to the loud porn the male does not hear the initial light tap on his door so he continues to enjoy the pleasures of youporn. The tapping increases to a banging at which point the male is at his vinegar strokes and can't stop to answer the door. The parents have been growing impatient and somehow unlock the door, barging in on the male with his pants down, in a culminating climax (pun intended) in which the shocked male screams and ejaculates on all parties involved. When finished all the ashamed male can think to say is a sheepish, "Surprise?!"
teenager: Man my parents are always making me do shit I don't want to do, I really want to get back at them.

teacher: Yea parents are like that. They only want whats best for you. Have you tried giving them the Pennsylvania Pornographic Surprise lately?
by RedDan69 February 28, 2011
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Leprechaun Cumshot

1. A delicious shot made of equal parts Bailey's Irish Cream, Jameson Irish Whiskey, and Green Creme de Menthe Liquor.

2. When A midget dresses in green and cums in your face.
1. Yo its St. Patrick's Day I'll have a Leprechaun Cumshot please!

2. Ouch! That Leprechaun Cumshot hurt my eye!
by RedDan69 March 28, 2011
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Michael Strahan

Noun or verb
Describes when a woman (or feminine man) takes a load in the mouth and then spits it back onto the guy through the gap in her (his) front teeth. This is usually done as payback for a male dominant sex act (i.e. donkey punch, angry dragon, chili rainbow, etc). Named after popular NFL player turned commentator and gap-toothed black man Micheal Strahan.

note: is mainly performed by gap-toothed hood rats and flaming butt monkeys, but some rich divorcees have been know to do the Michael Strahan from time to time.
Yo my man just gave me the Sneaky Castro last night so I gave him the old Micheal Strahan!

as a verb: I just Michael Strahan'd that cheating bastard of a husband!
by RedDan69 March 11, 2011
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Chloriney

adj. Chlorine with a y at the end. Used to describe the scent, feel/burn, and taste of chlorine. Usually used in and around swimming pools.
tracy (while standing on the pool deck): Man my eyes are burning.

dan: yea this pool is extra chloriney today.
by RedDan69 February 26, 2011
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