Skip to main content

optical_epilepsy's definitions

cops

The people we hate when we are breaking the law, but the people we love when the wrong people go crazy.
I hate cops when I get pulled over, but love cops when im at the mall and some crazy guy is killing people with an AK-47
by Optical_Epilepsy May 13, 2011
mugGet the cops mug.

conjumplaining

The act of jumping to conclusions so your right to complain is justified.

This tactic is typically involves deflective arguing and ignoring what the other person has to say.

People who use this tactic will also typically have very low respect for the person they are talking to, as well as having no sense of honor
Man: I wish women would stop being so selfish

Women: If your gay that's ok, nobody likes ugly, pathetic, desperate faggots anyway

Man: I'm so tired of women always conjumplaining

Women: If your gonna hit me, do it right now so I can beat you up, or file assault charges if you win the fight

Man: (censored for graphic violence)
by Optical_Epilepsy May 14, 2011
mugGet the conjumplaining mug.

assumptacking

Attempting to make somebody look bad by assuming what they meant is negative or wrong
Jacob: I wish people would stop abusing welfare

Jesse: So your saying all people who use welfare automatically will abuse it?

Jacob: Obviously not Jesse... Stop assumptacking me...

Jesse: So then exactly what are you saying?

Jacob: (sighs) Fine I'll repeat myself: I wish people would stop abusing welfare

Jesse: Oh so just because there poor and need welfare means they want to make other people suffer right?

Narrator: Jesse thinks he is making a point by being very assumptive and jumping to conclusions. He's really just being a douchebag and trying to make Jacob feel bad for his opinion. He better hope Jacob thinks carefully and doesn't reach for the knife...
by Optical_Epilepsy June 5, 2011
mugGet the assumptacking mug.

Playstation Move

Proof that Sony is getting desperate, does not have any sort of honor, and can't be original anymore. In case you could not tell, the Playstation Move is nothing more than a Wiimote with a ball on top. It's as close to copyright infringment as you can get.
The Playstation Move makes me want to cry
by Optical_Epilepsy June 5, 2011
mugGet the Playstation Move mug.

woman's candidate

A male who is cute, sexy, fine or otherwise considered attractive, but not a guy you would snatch up like a kidnapper.

This could be because you aren't sure he's the one you want yet, or because you do not chase men.
Kayla: Damn he's hot

Carla: Go getcha man girl

Kayla: Well I don't chase men cuz they chase me lol

Carla: Aw so he just a woman's candidate

Kayla: Yea exactly
by Optical_Epilepsy June 5, 2011
mugGet the woman's candidate mug.

aggressor

The person who tries to spit game or get with somebody for a potential relationship or a one night stand. This person must do everything just right, and if he/she messes up one time they probably won't get anything.

Being a successful aggressor takes practice, because you never know exactly what the other person wants you to say. Just be yourself but also very smooth and things should work out but if they don't then you know one of 2 things

1. Your approach was bad, he/she did not like it, and thinks that defines exactly who you are which they aren't looking for.

2. They aren't in the mood or situation to be talking with guys/girls on that level. They might have a boyfriend/girlfriend and be very committed OR just ain't tryna talk bout that right quick
Paul: Dude, check out Andy!
Simon: Is he hitting on Mahlia?
Paul: Yea she's super fine and got a good ass to waist ratio he's got balls for that
Simon: I hope he's a good aggressor, you don't wanna mess up with girls like her
by Optical_Epilepsy May 27, 2010
mugGet the aggressor mug.

hyperbodick

Somebody who takes an exaggeration, a figure of speech, or a hyperbole literally as a pathetic attempt to make you sound stupid

It's ironic though how when ever somebody tries to be one, after they rebuttal, all you can hear are crickets chirping
Normal Person: It's raining cats and dogs outside!

Hyperbodick: Animals can't fall from the sky you fucking moron! This faggot bitch cunt seriously thinks cats and dogs can fall from the sky, what a retard!

Normal Person: (pulls out pistol)
by Optical_Epilepsy December 10, 2011
mugGet the hyperbodick mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email