24 definitions by Optical_Epilepsy

The people we hate when we are breaking the law, but the people we love when the wrong people go crazy.
I hate cops when I get pulled over, but love cops when im at the mall and some crazy guy is killing people with an AK-47
by Optical_Epilepsy April 22, 2011
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Reading a text, email, or any other type of online message and deleting it without replying

This means that you obviously don't want to have any type of communication with who/whatever sent you the message.

If you question whether somebody is readeleting your messages, stick to the 24 hour reply rule and the 7 day reply rule
Steve: I sent this bitch 15 messages over the last 2 weeks and she ain't replying....

Dan: She's giving your messages the good old readelete, just let it go man
by Optical_Epilepsy September 3, 2010
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Attempting to make somebody look bad by assuming what they meant is negative or wrong
Jacob: I wish people would stop abusing welfare

Jesse: So your saying all people who use welfare automatically will abuse it?

Jacob: Obviously not Jesse... Stop assumptacking me...

Jesse: So then exactly what are you saying?

Jacob: (sighs) Fine I'll repeat myself: I wish people would stop abusing welfare

Jesse: Oh so just because there poor and need welfare means they want to make other people suffer right?

Narrator: Jesse thinks he is making a point by being very assumptive and jumping to conclusions. He's really just being a douchebag and trying to make Jacob feel bad for his opinion. He better hope Jacob thinks carefully and doesn't reach for the knife...
by Optical_Epilepsy April 24, 2011
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When a person who normally spells everything correctly, using proper grammar and punctuation, decides to send messages that heavily use slang, shortened spelling (u instead of you,) and little if any punctuation so the person they are texting will stick around long enough to get to know them.

This is commonly used by men who are trying to get with woman who are attractive, but are not interested in men who come off as nerdy, proper, and useful to society.

ILLITERATED DEFINITION: w3n dey talk l1ke a c00l p3rson
I used the example for illiterated texting in the definition
by Optical_Epilepsy March 17, 2011
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A definition of something that has been presented in a way so people who have trouble reading proper grammar, correct spelling, and proper punctuation can understand it.
(Normal definition of rain)

Rain: water falling in drops from vapor condensed in the atmosphere

(Illiterated definition of rain)

rain itz wen da water iz flln 4rm da c1ouds n 3vree buddy g3ts w3t
by Optical_Epilepsy March 17, 2011
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A male who is cute, sexy, fine or otherwise considered attractive, but not a guy you would snatch up like a kidnapper.

This could be because you aren't sure he's the one you want yet, or because you do not chase men.
Kayla: Damn he's hot

Carla: Go getcha man girl

Kayla: Well I don't chase men cuz they chase me lol

Carla: Aw so he just a woman's candidate

Kayla: Yea exactly
by Optical_Epilepsy May 9, 2011
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A question that cannot be answered without lying, or changing the subject to avoid an undesired effect.

This is commonly done in an argument or disagreement when they think doing so will make a point. It will only make a point to gullible morons.
Normal Person: The kicker is important in a football game.

Douchebag: Is he as important as the quarterback? (doomsday question)

Normal Person: (shakes head and sighs) What do you think...

Douchebag: I asked you not me

Normal Person: (depressed) No...

Douchebag: Exactly so you were wrong. The quarterback is much more important.

Normal Person: Did I say the kicker was more important than the quarterback?

Douchebag: So the kicker is more important? (doomsday question #2)
by Optical_Epilepsy June 28, 2011
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