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old lang guy's definitions

fork stuck in the road

A song line that seems to indicate ignorance, sloppiness, or lack of education on the part of the songwriter.

According to urban legend, the line in Green Day's "Good Riddance (The Time of Your Life)" "a fork stuck in the road" says that the fork is "stuck" rather than just "in the road" because of the mistaken idea that people somewhere back in "olden days" used to stick dinner forks into the road when they changed directions; the claim is often made that one or another member of Green Day told such a story during an interview, but if so there doesn't seem to be any such interview online. It really doesn't sound like them; they're a pretty bright bunch of people.
Alanis Morisette's "Ironic" is a fork stuck in the road; nothing she describes in the song is ironic.

"Hey, that doesn't mean what he thinks it means!"
"Relax, dude, at least it rhymes, and it's just a fork stuck in the road!"

Every time you hear the rolling thunder, you don't need to run, because the lightning already struck and you're still here to hear it.
by old lang guy September 30, 2006
mugGet the fork stuck in the roadmug.

cinderella fuck

In the ancient days of the 1970s, when dinosaurs ruled the earth and men were tiny squeaking rodents (not all that much has changed), a cinderella fuck was getting intercourse from a girl in her dorm room before the curfew when men were thrown out of the women's dorms. If you were really lucky, she'd want to get started early, but a lot of women preferred to start the cinderella fuck at about ten minutes to midnight. The opposite of a "rule of half past four."
"So you getting any?"

"I got about five minutes of a cinderella fuck before the PA announced 'all men off the floor.'"
by old lang guy August 24, 2007
mugGet the cinderella fuckmug.

I am fishing for your Goombas

Slang among political ops for "I am looking for dirt on your candidate." May or may not be connected to the classic line from The Godfather: "Clemenza sleeps with the fish." Meaning he's been whacked, per orders. So "Fishing for your Goombas," maybe, started out meaning "looking for the bodies in your candidate's background." (Classically such bodies would be a live boy or a dead girl).
"Hey, what's this bullshit with a guy with a camera in the parking lot at four in the morning?"

"I am fishing for your Goombas, asshole. If your boy can't keep it zipped, the people got a right to know."
by old lang guy October 14, 2006
mugGet the I am fishing for your Goombasmug.

mini-Helen

A misunderstanding of the old scientist/techie joke that a millihelen is the amount of beauty needed to launch one ship. Milli- is the international scientific prefix for 1/1000. Most international units are named after someone -- watt for power, newton for force, ampere for current, and so on. Scientists, techs, and gears who work with those prefixes all the time often attach them to all sorts of made-up units. So a megahelen would be the beauty of a face that launched a billion ships (one million times one thousand) and a nanohelen would be the face that launched one millionth of a ship (one billionth times one thousand). Millihelen worked better a few decades ago when newspapers and TV news often carried stories about ship launchings, because usually the woman christening the ship launch was a First Lady, the Queen, or some senator or lord's wife (what nowadays we call a first wife, the one before the trophy wife), and thus a lizardy old bag that was only sort of recognizably female.
"That one's a mini-Helen."

"Unless she's a real cute midget, you mean she's got about a millihelen. Go back to chemistry class and stop getting your science from Star Trek reruns!"
by old lang guy September 8, 2006
mugGet the mini-Helenmug.

monkey mind

Meditation term for a mind that refuses to be quiet and concentrated, so that your meditation is interfered with by your attention constantly finding new objects, like a monkey roaming through your brain.
If I concentrate very quietly I am sure I can think of an example, such as I wonder if Sandra wears panties in the summer?, no I mean an example of monkey mind, for which I need to concentrate like lemon juice concentrate god that's the best stuff for making lemonade to families with dependent children like monkeys infesting the mind and asking questions authority and authorizes questions come on there has to be an example of monkey mind your own business monkey business suit monkey suit
by old lang guy October 17, 2006
mugGet the monkey mindmug.

testin' my gangsta

Checking whether I am a real street thug or just a guy doing the clothes and the talk.
First party out of jail and this little suburban Megan was testin' my gangsta, she only wanted me if I'd really done time.
by old lang guy November 16, 2006
mugGet the testin' my gangstamug.

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