Definitions by nolandc
cliff vibes
A nuanced way to express that you want to throw yourself off a cliff.
Uttered in situations of overwhelming awkwardness, discomfort, or disappointment.
Uttered in situations of overwhelming awkwardness, discomfort, or disappointment.
cliff vibes by nolandc November 16, 2019
Venmo Hush
The radio silence from someone who is yet to pay you back on Venmo.
Venmo Hush arises when a debtor is too ashamed to respond to social calls and group chat messages, thanks to the elephant in the room. Short of death, Venmo Hush is the #1 cause for un-replied texts among millennials.
Venmo Hush arises when a debtor is too ashamed to respond to social calls and group chat messages, thanks to the elephant in the room. Short of death, Venmo Hush is the #1 cause for un-replied texts among millennials.
Venmo Hush by nolandc November 16, 2019
Equifox
A fox who belong to Equinox Sports Club. Healthy, wealthy and never stealthy about where she exercises.
Curvy, swervy, and hard to make plans with. The Equifox keeps a packed schedule thanks to her ass-shaping, ab-making, head-shaking workout regimen. She's busy exfoliating her toxins and lunging down 6th Avenue in New York, divesifying her portfolio of skincare "Assets.” She probably doesn't hang out with her friends because she’s determined that the value of her friendships are worth less than her Equinox membership.
Curvy, swervy, and hard to make plans with. The Equifox keeps a packed schedule thanks to her ass-shaping, ab-making, head-shaking workout regimen. She's busy exfoliating her toxins and lunging down 6th Avenue in New York, divesifying her portfolio of skincare "Assets.” She probably doesn't hang out with her friends because she’s determined that the value of her friendships are worth less than her Equinox membership.
Sauna del Rey
A room full of people sobbing while bobbing their heads, thanks to a speaker throbbing some fire sadpop.
A dance floor of sorrowful fist-pumpers. The name derives from Lana del Rey's devastating ballads, which have caused listeners to strip down to their emotions as they heat up on the dance floor. When a Sauna del Ray arises in a moving vehicle, the driver should pull over to the side of the road, hug their passengers, dab thrice, and draft a Tweet about "the shackles of love."
A dance floor of sorrowful fist-pumpers. The name derives from Lana del Rey's devastating ballads, which have caused listeners to strip down to their emotions as they heat up on the dance floor. When a Sauna del Ray arises in a moving vehicle, the driver should pull over to the side of the road, hug their passengers, dab thrice, and draft a Tweet about "the shackles of love."
Sauna del Rey by nolandc October 7, 2019
Boutique Call
(n.) An after-hours text from one’s boss demanding they return to the office. A professional's Booty Call.
Originated after the French Revolution, when the proletariat was forced to work long hours at the boutique because ownership had been killed by the Guillotine. Today, is often answered by individuals with a crumbling social life or a disturbing obsession with their boss.
Those who respond to a Boutique Call will often matter-of-factly mutter “No emotions, just promotions” before rollerblading all the way back to the office, in decline.
Originated after the French Revolution, when the proletariat was forced to work long hours at the boutique because ownership had been killed by the Guillotine. Today, is often answered by individuals with a crumbling social life or a disturbing obsession with their boss.
Those who respond to a Boutique Call will often matter-of-factly mutter “No emotions, just promotions” before rollerblading all the way back to the office, in decline.
Tom's Boutique Call led to "Quick Fix and Chill" session with his boss, as they watched HR videos and massaged each others' data.
Boutique Call by nolandc October 5, 2019
BourJersey
Denoting the American middle class.
Unlike the French Bourgeoisie, the BourJersey prefers tankinis to martinis, the Jersey Shore to the Seine, burgers to baguette, flip flops to Stan Smiths, and vape pens to cigarettes.
Unlike the French Bourgeoisie, the BourJersey prefers tankinis to martinis, the Jersey Shore to the Seine, burgers to baguette, flip flops to Stan Smiths, and vape pens to cigarettes.
Lauren met a very bourjersey dude on Tinder, and they went on a date at the Boardwalk and tossed a football until dawn.
BourJersey by nolandc October 4, 2019
Professor Thanos
(n.) A teacher who curves a class to fail 50% of students.
Often found in fields of physics or mathematics, a Professor Thanos is attracted to balance and assures the class his grading philosophy “is for your own good.” At the snap of Professor Thanos’s fingers, half of the graduating seniors will simply fade away.
Often found in fields of physics or mathematics, a Professor Thanos is attracted to balance and assures the class his grading philosophy “is for your own good.” At the snap of Professor Thanos’s fingers, half of the graduating seniors will simply fade away.
Professor Thanos by nolandc October 4, 2019