nicholas d's definitions

five guys burgers and fries

A heterosexual female or homosexual male who is both obese and promiscuous. “Five guys” refers to the servicing of many men, and “burgers and fries” refers to all the fatty food they eat.

Brenda really makes the rounds whenever she’s not stuffing down cheese and charcuterie plates. She’s no stranger to the biscuit tin and no stranger to the sausage bin. Five guys burgers and fries!

by Nicholas D February 23, 2022

Barry Bonds*

A baseball player who, as of the end of the 2007 season, had a record 762* home runs.

In 2007, Barry Bonds* hit his 756th* home run, passing Hank Aaron for the all time record*. He also holds the single season record* of 73* home runs. Previous single-season record-holders include Mark McGwire*, Roger Maris, and Babe Ruth.

Bob: "Barry Bonds in the 1990's was a hell of a player, wasn't he?"
Joe: "Yeah, but his numbers pale in comparison to what Barry Bonds* put up."
Bob: "Who's that?"
Joe: "You know, that guy on the Giants with a watermelon-sized head who set all those records*."

by Nicholas D January 16, 2008

put your bid in

To attempt to hook up with a girl. Literally means that all the guys at the bar/club who are interested in the girl will show her what they have to offer, and she will go home the "highest bidder" and probably allow him to chuck it in her.

"I'm tryin' to put my bid in / No I'm just kiddin' / Come on girl, get in."
-Snoop Dogg, "Let's Get Blown"

"I'm a put my bid in and tell you something slick / Whisper in ya ear while I'm holdin' my dick."
-E-40, "U and Dat"

Awkward tool: "Hey there girl. You are one fly-ass bitch if I do say so myself. What do you say we get out of here and go to my place? Skeet skeet!"
Girl: "Fool I'm just here to hang out with my girls. If you're trying to put your bid in, it ain't gonna work."
Awkward tool: "Really? You're taking bids? In that case, how does $100 sound? I'm a little short on cash though - is it ok if I write you a check?"
Girl: "The fuck? Oh no you didn't! I ain't no ho!" ***SMACK!***

by Nicholas D February 11, 2009

allez opi-omi

An exclamation one uses when a major catastrophe occurs. Comes from the sign a woman was holding that was struck by a 2021 Tour de France rider, causing almost the entire peloton to crash in a massive pile-up. Literally means "Go grandpa-grandma".

*gigantic asteroid crashes into the Yucatan Peninsula 65 million years ago*
T-Rex: "Allez opi-omi! That doesn't seem so good."

by Nicholas D July 29, 2021

take to the house

To throughly own or school someone. A way to measure whether someone has been taken to the house is whether it would be appropriate to inquire of the person in question: "How's your hole?" If asking such a question would indeed be befitting of the situation, then that person has indeed been taken to the house.

A heart-warming children's story to demonstrate the meaning of "take to the house":
Billy's dad told him that he was taking him to Disneyland for the day and told him to close his eyes. After a half hour of driving, his dad instructed him to open his eyes again. Billy realized he was not at Disneyland, but instead back at his house again. His dad then yelled, "Slizzam!!! Got you, sucker! No Disneyland for you, you little bitch!" and started laughing hysterically. Billy then began to cry as his dad taunted him, "Wah wah!!! You little crybaby! I'll give you something to cry about!" Looks like little Billy got taken to the house on that one.

Also:
Fred Weis got taken to the house in the 2000 Olympics when Vince Carter simultaneously dunked over him and teabagged him, shoving his nuts directly into Fred's face.

by Nicholas D December 24, 2007

gatsby

a synonym for cool, swanky, or just generally off the hizzle

Nick D: "Yo, let's go to Il Teatro."
Nicholas D: "Yeah, that place is pretty gatsby."

Joe: "Did you ever read The Great Gatsby?"
Bob: "Yeah, that book is hella gatsby. Thanks for being in it, Jay."
Jay Gatsby: "No problem guys. Alright, let's go get mad Hemingway. I'm jonesing for a Martini."

by Nicholas D November 11, 2003

run up and squeeze

To approach and shoot somebody.

"I'll run up and squeeze and put a hole in ya." - 50 Cent, "Places to Go"

Manny: "Bitch did you just step on my foot?"
Reggie: "Chill man, it was an accident."
Manny: "Fool oh no you didn't. I'm fin' to spark metal on yo' ass."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm gonna ride on you, dogg."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm gonna run up and pop you."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm gonna bust a cap in yo' ass."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm fin' to blast my gat on you."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm gonna roll up and squeeze and put a hole in ya."
Reggie: "What?"
Manny: "I'm gonna shoot you!"
Reggie: "Oh ok. I really didn't understand what you were trying to say there. You've been spending too much time on Urban Dictionary. You should cut down on the slang if you want to get your point across effectively."
Manny: "Wow, I never thought of it that way. Now that you mention it, I should make an attempt to use more straightforward language in the future when threatening someone. Thanks for the tip."
Reggie: "No problem. See you later."

by Nicholas D October 1, 2009