nicholas d's definitions
A figurative term meaning to check if someone is being honest. Comes from Riskay 's song "Smell Yo Dick" about checking for infidelity, but has since come into usage in a business setting.
Jimmy: "So we are giving you exclusive access to this special deal for $35k since you are our absolute favorite client."
Peter: "Johnson, can you call up Willy from Cox-Zucker and see what they were offered?"
Jimmy: "Wait, what? You don't trust me?"
Johnson: "Willy confirms an offer of $29k."
Jimmy: "Well I never! That's preposterous!"
Peter: " Sorry buddy, had to go ahead and smell your dick on this one. And it stinks. Well, so much for this deal. Later, Jimmy."
Peter: "Johnson, can you call up Willy from Cox-Zucker and see what they were offered?"
Jimmy: "Wait, what? You don't trust me?"
Johnson: "Willy confirms an offer of $29k."
Jimmy: "Well I never! That's preposterous!"
Peter: " Sorry buddy, had to go ahead and smell your dick on this one. And it stinks. Well, so much for this deal. Later, Jimmy."
by Nicholas D May 17, 2016
Get the smell your dick mug.A person, usually a heterosexual female, who pursues relationships or hookups with the founders of tech startups. Like a jersey chaser for nerds. This term was used in the "Bachmanity Insanity" episode of "Silicon Valley."
Clive: "Hey Otto, how's the organic sustainable single-origin artisanal small batch cold brew nitro coffee roasting gig going?"
Otto: "Not great, man. It turns out that our proprietary method of using only high altitude Jamaican Blue Mountain beans filtered through the digestive tract of a civet cat is pretty expensive. So we set our price at $10 a cup, which barely covers our costs, but it's been hard to compete with these low-end stores like Four Barrel and Ritual that sell coffee for only $7, and the peasants here in SF actually drink that swill instead of ours. We went out of business."
Clive: "Oh well, at least you have Matilda. She's your ride-or-die-bitch, right?"
Otto: "Um, not really. She ditched me for this douchebag who is Co-Founder and CEO of this stupid app called Pewply."
Clive: "You mean the app where you take a picture of your feces and it gives you dietary recommendations based on their machine learning big data algorithms? Dude, Pewply is awesome. It totally helped me better come to grips with my gluten allergy."
Otto: "Yeah I'm sensitive to gluten too. But I can't believe she left me for this chode just because of his piece of crap - no pun intended - startup!"
Clive: "Connect the dots, man. Before you, she hooked up with the founders of Markitable, Zenalytics, Flooberli, Sharepnp, and Majikly. She's a classic founder hounder!"
Otto: "Not great, man. It turns out that our proprietary method of using only high altitude Jamaican Blue Mountain beans filtered through the digestive tract of a civet cat is pretty expensive. So we set our price at $10 a cup, which barely covers our costs, but it's been hard to compete with these low-end stores like Four Barrel and Ritual that sell coffee for only $7, and the peasants here in SF actually drink that swill instead of ours. We went out of business."
Clive: "Oh well, at least you have Matilda. She's your ride-or-die-bitch, right?"
Otto: "Um, not really. She ditched me for this douchebag who is Co-Founder and CEO of this stupid app called Pewply."
Clive: "You mean the app where you take a picture of your feces and it gives you dietary recommendations based on their machine learning big data algorithms? Dude, Pewply is awesome. It totally helped me better come to grips with my gluten allergy."
Otto: "Yeah I'm sensitive to gluten too. But I can't believe she left me for this chode just because of his piece of crap - no pun intended - startup!"
Clive: "Connect the dots, man. Before you, she hooked up with the founders of Markitable, Zenalytics, Flooberli, Sharepnp, and Majikly. She's a classic founder hounder!"
by Nicholas D May 31, 2016
Get the founder hounder mug.A combination nanny state and anarchy: A government that cracks down on trivial everyday things while letting actual criminals run rampant, failing to prosecute serious crimes. Example: San Francisco 2020 under DA Chesa Boudin.
John was caught breaking into fifty cars, dealing crack to kids, and stabbing a cop. The San Francisco DA let him off with $1 bail for these silly but harmless shenanigans. But then they caught him drinking through a plastic straw rather than a compostable one while celebrating his release, and sentenced him to 20 years in maximum security prison for committing such a serious felony. Just another victim of the nannarchy...
by Nicholas D January 31, 2020
Get the nannarchy mug.To shamelessly increase diversity, inclusion, and references to modern-day issues in a story to promote social justice. The opposite of whitewash.
Writer: “I’ve got a movie idea! Let’s do the moon landing, except all the astronauts are morbidly obese paraplegic non-binary Muslim Australian aboriginals!”
Director: “Brilliant! This is your best idea since we won that Oscar for ‘D-Dayversity’, the story about the Normandy invasion except with all autistic pansexual transgender Kalahari bushpeople. You can wokewash like nobody I’ve ever seen!”
Director: “Brilliant! This is your best idea since we won that Oscar for ‘D-Dayversity’, the story about the Normandy invasion except with all autistic pansexual transgender Kalahari bushpeople. You can wokewash like nobody I’ve ever seen!”
by Nicholas D March 1, 2020
Get the wokewash mug.The politically correct term for a postal worker. The old offensive term is “mailman” but “mail” is sexist because it sounds like “male” and “man” is obviously sexist to female or non-binary postal workers.
Female postal worker: “I’m here to bring you your 25 annoying unsolicited Capital One offers for the day! Enjoy tossing these straight in the recycling bin.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
by Nicholas D March 21, 2020
Get the personperson mug.The New Yorker staff fired Jeffrey Toobin for Toobin on an election simulation Zoom call after he misread the event as an erection stimulation call.
by Nicholas D October 20, 2020
Get the Toob mug.Bro 1: “Hey brah wanna come to the Rose Garden party where we celebrate that Supreme Court lady biting the dust?”
Bro 2: “Nah brah that place is gonna be a total rone zone.”
Bro 2: “Nah brah that place is gonna be a total rone zone.”
by Nicholas D October 9, 2020
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