nicholas d's definitions
To mess up completely and utterly; to screw the pooch. Comes from pornstar/influencer/philosopher Aella's 2024 birthday gangbang, where 5 of the 37 guys allowed to have intercourse with Aella came in the fluffer and missed their shot at the birthday girl. A fluffer is an assistant who keeps performers excited on pornography sets to prepare for their scene.
Johnson, if you don't get that TPS report in by end of day you're going to get shitcanned. Step it up and don't cum in the fluffer here.
by Nicholas D March 3, 2024
Get the cum in the fluffermug. Mildred: “Heavens to Betsy, Barney, I already took my dentures out and you’ve gone soft on me!”
Barney: "For Pete’s sake, woman, it’s just the old ghostwood again! Let me pop this Viagra and I’ll be rarin’ to go in a jiffy.”
Barney: "For Pete’s sake, woman, it’s just the old ghostwood again! Let me pop this Viagra and I’ll be rarin’ to go in a jiffy.”
by Nicholas D May 2, 2021
Get the ghostwoodmug. The uncooked bread got sick of walking around the bakery with all the other delicious, already-cooked breads, so he decided to bake like a challah and leaven.
by Nicholas D June 6, 2004
Get the bake like a challah and leavenmug. Jared: "Oh man, don't tell me these jokers are trying to get high off the Reddi-Wip can again."
Reggie: "Yeah, the hell with that shit. I've got a fat bag of grass we can smoke back at my place. Let's blow this bitch."
Jared: "Word to your mother."
Reggie: "Yeah, the hell with that shit. I've got a fat bag of grass we can smoke back at my place. Let's blow this bitch."
Jared: "Word to your mother."
by Nicholas D December 24, 2007
Get the blow this bitchmug. To hold up two fingers with the intent of signifying that you have to drop a deuce, i.e. take a crap.
Johnson: "Now Frank, you have to cut the green wire first. Go ahead and do that now."
Frank: "Ok, cutting the green wire. Here goes nothing...got it! What's next?"
Johnson: "You're doing great, Frankie. How much time do we have left?"
Frank: "One minute, forty-seven seconds til she blows."
Johnson: "Now cut the blue wire. Once you do that, there's only one more step until the bomb is disarmed."
Frank: "I can barely see down here...ok, blue wire, blue wire...I think this is it. Cutting now...ok, we're clear. What now, Johnson?"
Johnson (in the background): "Oh shit! Agnes, get the phone for me."
Frank: "Johnson!!! Are you there?"
Johnson's secretary: "Sorry hon, I just saw him flash the deuce. My guess is he'll be on the crapper for the next 10 minutes or so. Today was the office chili con carne festival. You'd better call back later."
Frank: "But we have to dismantle this bomb!!!"
Johnson's secretary: "Um yeah...I wouldn't know anything about that. I suggest you try calling back around...oh...maybe 3:30 this afternoon. Buh-bye now."
Frank: "Ok, cutting the green wire. Here goes nothing...got it! What's next?"
Johnson: "You're doing great, Frankie. How much time do we have left?"
Frank: "One minute, forty-seven seconds til she blows."
Johnson: "Now cut the blue wire. Once you do that, there's only one more step until the bomb is disarmed."
Frank: "I can barely see down here...ok, blue wire, blue wire...I think this is it. Cutting now...ok, we're clear. What now, Johnson?"
Johnson (in the background): "Oh shit! Agnes, get the phone for me."
Frank: "Johnson!!! Are you there?"
Johnson's secretary: "Sorry hon, I just saw him flash the deuce. My guess is he'll be on the crapper for the next 10 minutes or so. Today was the office chili con carne festival. You'd better call back later."
Frank: "But we have to dismantle this bomb!!!"
Johnson's secretary: "Um yeah...I wouldn't know anything about that. I suggest you try calling back around...oh...maybe 3:30 this afternoon. Buh-bye now."
by Nicholas D June 17, 2008
Get the flash the deucemug. Short for avatar, i.e. a computer representation of a person. Cannot be used as a short form for the movie "Avatar."
Lloyd: "Dude, stop making your av crouch over my av's corpse like he's taking a dump on it. That move's getting old."
Harry: "Sorry, not happening. Cleveland steamer comin' right up!"
Lloyd: "Hey man, have you seen 'Av' yet?"
Harry: "What the hell is 'Av'? 'Avenue Q'? Avril Lavigne? 'Alien vs. Predator'?"
Lloyd: "No, 'Avatar' obviously."
Harry: "Sorry dude, as an officer of the grammar police I'm going to have to cite you on that illegal abbreviation. You can pay me the $100 fine anytime."
Lloyd: "What? I don't owe you..."
Harry: (pulls out gun) "Break yo self, fool!"
Harry: "Sorry, not happening. Cleveland steamer comin' right up!"
Lloyd: "Hey man, have you seen 'Av' yet?"
Harry: "What the hell is 'Av'? 'Avenue Q'? Avril Lavigne? 'Alien vs. Predator'?"
Lloyd: "No, 'Avatar' obviously."
Harry: "Sorry dude, as an officer of the grammar police I'm going to have to cite you on that illegal abbreviation. You can pay me the $100 fine anytime."
Lloyd: "What? I don't owe you..."
Harry: (pulls out gun) "Break yo self, fool!"
by Nicholas D September 10, 2011
Get the avmug. The politically correct term for a postal worker. The old offensive term is “mailman” but “mail” is sexist because it sounds like “male” and “man” is obviously sexist to female or non-binary postal workers.
Female postal worker: “I’m here to bring you your 25 annoying unsolicited Capital One offers for the day! Enjoy tossing these straight in the recycling bin.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
by Nicholas D March 21, 2020
Get the personpersonmug.