i just know, okay

How to explain away a lack of evidence or facts to back up the shit you are spouting.

Simon: that new girl would definitely rather fuck me than you.
Dan: what's that based on then?
Simon: I just know, okay

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

chocolate mr whippy

A long stream of light airy shit

I couldn't stop, it was like chocolate mr whippy

by mattpacer May 16, 2016

dick funk

A filthy smell. The product of not washing beneath the foreskin

Simon: oh babe do me a favour , go down...
Kim: No way Simon! I'm not going anywhere near that dick funk

by mattpacer May 16, 2016

backwards shit

Straddling the toilet when taking a dump.

Simon was feeling anxious because his morning shit was overdue and traditional squat and drop wasn't working. He was feeling dangerous, so committed himself to a backwards shit.

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

cunt sandwich

Middle lane cunt surrounded on either side by people who know how to drive

Simon was cruising down the motorway, ahead he can see a car in the middle lane with the slow lane completely empty .He sees a silver lupo aggressively on its tail and moving towards the inside lane to undercut. So Simon had no choice but to take the outer lane and cunt sandwich the fuck outa the wanker in the middle lane .

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

ass smudge

When an offensively fat individual sits down on the toilet, misses the centre and leaves a gross shit stain on the back edge of the toilet seat.

Timmy: I swear if Simon leaves one more ass smudge on the toilet seat I'm going to flip.
Craig: Man he can't help it, he huge.

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

mike wong

The stereotypical Chinese American.

Cindy: hey, who's that new guy? He's cute.
Lisa: I don't know, just some Mike Wong

by mattpacer May 15, 2016