magickdio's definitions
Someone you meet up with online and masturbate with on cam. There are two likely outcomes to this situation- you either eventually get over each other, or eventually get under each other. It depends on how excellent and sexy the wank buddy is as to which you will allow to happen.
A classic mistake is performed by the "one sided" wank buddy- ie, only one person puts on their cam and relies on the snazzy wording of the other person to get them off. When they eventually see the other person, they usually turn out to be a middle aged fat man eating a bag of doritos with the same hand he's wanking with. This leads to suicidal moments and feelings of being deeply unclean. TAKE NOTE- Screen your prospective wank buddy before you take off your pants and get stuck in.
A classic mistake is performed by the "one sided" wank buddy- ie, only one person puts on their cam and relies on the snazzy wording of the other person to get them off. When they eventually see the other person, they usually turn out to be a middle aged fat man eating a bag of doritos with the same hand he's wanking with. This leads to suicidal moments and feelings of being deeply unclean. TAKE NOTE- Screen your prospective wank buddy before you take off your pants and get stuck in.
"No, I don't want to watch Glee with you, I've got plans with my wank buddy"
"Thank God I've got a wank buddy, or I'd just cry myself into a sexless and frustrated sleep"
"Thank God I've got a wank buddy, or I'd just cry myself into a sexless and frustrated sleep"
by MagickDio March 4, 2010

What ungroomed ladies and gentleman have going on in their pants. Pubic 'fro. It is an outdated practice that people look back on with some embarrasment that they ever conducted themselves in such a fashion. The only people that enjoy Disco Fever are people that have never experienced a smoother style, or people that can't let go of the hairy, disgusting past.
So, I undressed her and it was like, Boom!! Welcome to the 70's! Disco fever going on in Gem's pants!
by MagickDio September 14, 2010

Like Secret Santa in that one person delivers something to another, and the recipient was unaware that it was heading their way. Except that the delivery is not a Christmas gift, it's an epic bollocking.
1) One of your friends or family will ultimately humiliate you and make you want to die on the spot. Secret Sergeant encompasses the art of working out which one of the fuckers it will be, eg- one of them is secretly waiting to tear you to shreds, Sgt. style, and the rest of them probably know about it.
2) If you're quietly waiting for the best moment to crush your friend's/lover's/sister's or otherwise acquainted or related person's world, and you have discussed it with others, you are the Secret Sergeant. The way you get your kicks is by not being discovered by your intended target, and getting that moment of sweet, sweet satisfaction when the unsuspecting person falls apart before your eyes. A good Secret Sergeant could wipe the smile off a leprechaun's face.
1) One of your friends or family will ultimately humiliate you and make you want to die on the spot. Secret Sergeant encompasses the art of working out which one of the fuckers it will be, eg- one of them is secretly waiting to tear you to shreds, Sgt. style, and the rest of them probably know about it.
2) If you're quietly waiting for the best moment to crush your friend's/lover's/sister's or otherwise acquainted or related person's world, and you have discussed it with others, you are the Secret Sergeant. The way you get your kicks is by not being discovered by your intended target, and getting that moment of sweet, sweet satisfaction when the unsuspecting person falls apart before your eyes. A good Secret Sergeant could wipe the smile off a leprechaun's face.
"One of them is going to go all Secret Sergeant about me running off to vegas and getting married....I need to know which one it is"
"He cried his eyes out. He didn't even see it coming, and I didn't care for his weak and pathetic tears. I went totally Secret Sergeant on him!"
"He cried his eyes out. He didn't even see it coming, and I didn't care for his weak and pathetic tears. I went totally Secret Sergeant on him!"
by MagickDio February 17, 2010

That time of day when whatever you're doing becomes so irritating that you simply have to cease immediately and exit the area. No matter what the clock states as the actual time, it is still Fuck This Shit O'Clock. Morning, noon and night, any second of any hour can become Fuck This Shit O'Clock. So named because when the moment is reached, people tend to either do a wild, exasperated hand flinging gesture or smash their hands down onto a surface and say "Fuck this shit!!" And then leave.
It should be noted that although the time of Fuck This Shit O'Clock is randomly assigned, some people hate their jobs so intensely that 5pm Monday to Friday becomes Fuck This Shit O'Clock.
It should be noted that although the time of Fuck This Shit O'Clock is randomly assigned, some people hate their jobs so intensely that 5pm Monday to Friday becomes Fuck This Shit O'Clock.
"Dave, can you just run me off twenty copies of this on your way past the photocopier?"
"Sorry Sir, no can do. It's Fuck This Shit O'Clock and I'm outta here."
"Sorry Sir, no can do. It's Fuck This Shit O'Clock and I'm outta here."
by MagickDio October 9, 2012

Male camel toe. When the seam of the trousers rides up and digs into the scrotum, seperating the testicles so that one is on each side of the offending seam. Thus creating a visual display that is reminiscent of a chipmunk with its cheeks stuffed with food, but not in the slightest bit cute. When it happens suddenly, it is accompanied by an instant look of discomfort and the need to slope off and rearrange ones giblets.
"Guys, wait here, I'm just going round the corner to sort out these chipmunk cheeks"
"Can you SEE that bloke on the barstool?? Look at the chipmunk cheeks! How can he not feel that??"
"Can you SEE that bloke on the barstool?? Look at the chipmunk cheeks! How can he not feel that??"
by MagickDio March 3, 2010

Descriptive term for the first part of a sexual relationship.
Bang drunkeness is easily to spot. You don't care about anything but the crotch of your "love" and you will cancel plans, stand up friends, miss work, birthday parties, meals and social interaction with other human beings. You spend your time balls deep. And you don't give a toss about anything except banging the hell out of your "love"
You tend to sober up when they start talking about other things and telling you their useless opinions.
Bang drunkeness is easily to spot. You don't care about anything but the crotch of your "love" and you will cancel plans, stand up friends, miss work, birthday parties, meals and social interaction with other human beings. You spend your time balls deep. And you don't give a toss about anything except banging the hell out of your "love"
You tend to sober up when they start talking about other things and telling you their useless opinions.
"Where's Geoff?? We rescheduled this on his say so and he's not here!"
"With Rose I bet. The guy is totally bang drunk"
"With Rose I bet. The guy is totally bang drunk"
by MagickDio September 28, 2011

Testicles come in few shapes, more sizes and even more levels of maintenance and cleanliness. Balls have been arranged into categories by people who care about what they put in their mouths. They are defined as follows
Category 1- The creme de la creme of bollocks. Tight, defuzzed, cleaned with some kind of soap and good sized.
Category 2- Trimmed, wiped with a wet flannel and either slightly large or slightly small. A slight smell of sweat is OK, terrible smell will shunt you down to category 4.
Category 3- Untamed, lynxed to within an inch of their lives, size indistinguishable under the 'fro.
Category 4- Scrotum appears to have space for at least 4 more testicles, overpowering rank scent of stale sweat and ignorant of all hair removal methods.
Category 5- Alien nards. Something weird or horrifying, like an extra one, or ropey veins all over.
Category 1- The creme de la creme of bollocks. Tight, defuzzed, cleaned with some kind of soap and good sized.
Category 2- Trimmed, wiped with a wet flannel and either slightly large or slightly small. A slight smell of sweat is OK, terrible smell will shunt you down to category 4.
Category 3- Untamed, lynxed to within an inch of their lives, size indistinguishable under the 'fro.
Category 4- Scrotum appears to have space for at least 4 more testicles, overpowering rank scent of stale sweat and ignorant of all hair removal methods.
Category 5- Alien nards. Something weird or horrifying, like an extra one, or ropey veins all over.
by MagickDio August 20, 2010
