magickdio's definitions
Spar-GER; the cheap, bitter, drain-cleaning-fluid-like substance contained within generic white cans and sold as lager at your local Spar. Essentially, it is carbonated tramp piss.
"I've only got £2 to get collins'ed on. Looks like I'd better buy a 12 pack of Sparger"
"He said it was Corona, but it literally took the skin from the inside of my mouth. I'm sure it was Sparger"
"He said it was Corona, but it literally took the skin from the inside of my mouth. I'm sure it was Sparger"
by MagickDio February 4, 2010
Get the Spargermug. The tense game played by couples who have been together long enough to feel true rage. You'd think that "fuck" would always be the chosen option, but sometimes bringing someone else to tears is more sastisfying than orgasm.
Stress is building, and you're pretty sure it's all down to your significant other. They are looking at you as if they want to see you disembowelled. From this point in, it's simple. You're either going to tear strips off each other and compete over who can shout the loudest, and who can dig up the most dirt to sling at the other- ie "Ruck", or you're going to lunge for each other and tear off each others clothes and shag like the world is about to end- ie "Fuck"
Ruck or Fuck, amigo. You decide.
Stress is building, and you're pretty sure it's all down to your significant other. They are looking at you as if they want to see you disembowelled. From this point in, it's simple. You're either going to tear strips off each other and compete over who can shout the loudest, and who can dig up the most dirt to sling at the other- ie "Ruck", or you're going to lunge for each other and tear off each others clothes and shag like the world is about to end- ie "Fuck"
Ruck or Fuck, amigo. You decide.
"He'd come home drunk, because he said I was doing his head in, and then he started yelling at me for giving him "evils" and speaking to me like I was a kid....it was ruck or fuck, mate"
"And? Which one was it?"
"Ruck!! There's no way I'm letting him speak to me like that!"
"Bad choice. I'd have chosen fuck.....always choose fuck!"
"And? Which one was it?"
"Ruck!! There's no way I'm letting him speak to me like that!"
"Bad choice. I'd have chosen fuck.....always choose fuck!"
by MagickDio April 2, 2010
Get the Ruck Or Fuckmug. Comes from the way pissed up folk say "best friend." To be a "bessfriend" for any length of time is incredibly unfortunate. You attain this dreaded status by having a drunken person latch onto you and tell you all their problems, cry on your shoulder and generally kill your groove. Several times, through hiccups and sobs about ex partners, you will hear the words "You're like my bessfriend, you are." Note- you don't even have to really KNOW this person to be their bessfriend for the night.
The worst bessfriend situations occur when they are members of the opposite sex. You either get cock blocked or pussy locked all night by the weepy eyed, wretched looking individual clinging desperately to your wrist.
The worst bessfriend situations occur when they are members of the opposite sex. You either get cock blocked or pussy locked all night by the weepy eyed, wretched looking individual clinging desperately to your wrist.
"Why didn't you come to the club last night? We all wondered where you got to. Did you go home?"
"No such luck. Some mental bitch in Yates's decided to make me her "bessfriend" for the night, and I just could NOT shake her!"
"No such luck. Some mental bitch in Yates's decided to make me her "bessfriend" for the night, and I just could NOT shake her!"
by MagickDio April 24, 2010
Get the Bessfriendmug. In the singular, this is a term more commonly slurred by drunken idiots- ie "You, eh? Eh!! You don'even wannave a go at Mick, you'll get your'ed ripped off, right?? Eh!! He's fnard! Harder n you!!" In this instance, the words "fucking" and "hard" have been run together.
In the plural, the term is used to describe the chubby, thigh chafed bollocks of those men who can't find high street trousers that do up around their sagging beer gut. Fat nards. Fnards.
In the plural, the term is used to describe the chubby, thigh chafed bollocks of those men who can't find high street trousers that do up around their sagging beer gut. Fat nards. Fnards.
Geoff flopped gratefully down on the nudist beach; ignoring the horrified stares of the beautiful people he opened his legs and aired his fnards.
by MagickDio September 3, 2010
Get the Fnardsmug. 1) Girls who indulge in girl on girl action when surrounded by girls only. Despite being hetero, they get their jollies the gay way, rather than have no action at all. Common in students at all girls boarding schools.
2) A girl who announces she's gay when being chatted up by a bloke she finds repellent.
3) The heterosexual emo females, who believe that gayness=coolness and therefore have all been gay/are currently gay/will be gay very soon but will embrace their genuine sexuality when that is in fashion.
2) A girl who announces she's gay when being chatted up by a bloke she finds repellent.
3) The heterosexual emo females, who believe that gayness=coolness and therefore have all been gay/are currently gay/will be gay very soon but will embrace their genuine sexuality when that is in fashion.
1) I first had sex when I was seventeen, if you don't count the two years in which I attended Roedean and was a convenient lesbian.
2) Phil decided to go home after being shot down by the fifth convenient lesbian of the night.
3) Those emo girls aren't actually gay, you know. They're just convenient lesbians. Next week they'll be into pre-op transexuals to coincide with the latest reality tv show.
2) Phil decided to go home after being shot down by the fifth convenient lesbian of the night.
3) Those emo girls aren't actually gay, you know. They're just convenient lesbians. Next week they'll be into pre-op transexuals to coincide with the latest reality tv show.
by MagickDio November 7, 2012
Get the Convenient Lesbianmug. Rain.
This is a term you use to confuse and disgust small children so that they keep their hoods or umbrellas up. Cemented by someone, usually their father, saying "It's pissing down!"
This is a term you use to confuse and disgust small children so that they keep their hoods or umbrellas up. Cemented by someone, usually their father, saying "It's pissing down!"
"Keep your umbrella over your head! I've only just done your hair! You don't want it getting all rained on, babe, d'ya know why? Cos rain is Sky Wee. That's right. Wee. From the sky. So keep your umbrella where it's meant to be."
by MagickDio July 17, 2011
Get the Sky Weemug. 1) Ridiculous old-school talk which means "Don't say anything". It's right up there with "Pick your feet up", "Pull your socks up", "Hold your horses" and "Sleep tight". These are also phrases which, if taken literally, would be amusing viewing.
2) A cautionary comment to a bloke who may be considering sex with a woman whose disease status is unknown, but looks rife. (Condoms won't help if you're making oral contact with females, kids. They're not magic.) It obviously means "Don't go down on her, you'll get herpes"
2) A cautionary comment to a bloke who may be considering sex with a woman whose disease status is unknown, but looks rife. (Condoms won't help if you're making oral contact with females, kids. They're not magic.) It obviously means "Don't go down on her, you'll get herpes"
1) "My mummy says you're a harlot"
"Hold your tongue, Julia! And pick your feet up!"
2) "Right, I'm leaving now. Guys, this is Kelly"
(gestures to bleach blonde wearing velour tracksuit and giant hoop earrings, chewing gum and smoking at the same time)
"Alright, but Dave? Take this durex and for the love of God, hold your tongue"
"Hold your tongue, Julia! And pick your feet up!"
2) "Right, I'm leaving now. Guys, this is Kelly"
(gestures to bleach blonde wearing velour tracksuit and giant hoop earrings, chewing gum and smoking at the same time)
"Alright, but Dave? Take this durex and for the love of God, hold your tongue"
by MagickDio April 27, 2010
Get the Hold Your Tonguemug.