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White Mercedes

The White Mercedes is another SoCal staple; often times a sedan or SUV, but bonus points if it's a convertible, which is hot as fuck. A white Mercedes sedan with chrome wheels is essentially the Camry of Orange County, and if you had a dollar for every white Mercedes you spotted in or around LA in a day, you could probably buy one of your own in a couple hours. In the 2000s, the white Mercedes of choice for Newport Beach doctors, young celebs in Beverly Hills and "coastal grandmothers" in Malibu was the CLK convertible, which was super fetch while it was still in production. Now it's the G550 or G63, with the S-Class sedan and the E-Class family also being commonplace. Like with the White Range Rover, the White Mercedes is likely to be found sandwiched between an Escalade and a White Lexus at South Coast Plaza, parked in front of a plastic surgeon's office, in the driveway of a hideous McMansion, or in the drive-thru line at Starbucks. A White Mercedes is the ultimate LA status symbol.
God, it seems like everyone and their mom down here has a White Mercedes!
by henry1272838442 March 19, 2023
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Marin County

Marin County summed up:

- The old bearded hippie who drives a beat-up Peugeot station wagon and does Simon & Garfunkel covers is actually a multimillionaire.
- They claim to be liberals, but are visibly uncomfortable around people of color.
- There are more Porsche 911s than there are Black people.
- No good Asian food, except for maybe 3 restaurants.
- Only Tam, Marin Academy, Redwood, Branson and to some extent, Marin Catholic are relevant.
- The only immigrants here are your friends' Swedish, Dutch or German moms or French, British or Italian dads.
- Houses may be ugly 80s leftovers, but they're still worth $5 million.
- Kids turn into druggies or alcoholics before their sixteenth birthdays, and their parents let them.
- Your dad is in a band, mountain bikes, and has an old BMW or Porsche.
- Your mom teaches yoga, has a Patagonia puffer and only shops at farmers' markets.
Marin County is the only place I've ever seen a Range Rover with a Bernie Sanders bumper sticker.
by henry1272838442 March 25, 2023
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E-Class Wagon

One of the most Stealth Wealth, east coast prep, WASP-y cars out there. Even though E-Class sedans are practically the upper-middle-class Camry, E-Class Wagons, along with subtly-specced Range Rovers, "tastefully-worn-out" graduation-present BMWs and unmodified USDM Toyota Land Cruisers are automotive indicators of some serious wealth and possibly intelligence. They, like the other Euro wagons, are unsurprisingly popular in college towns. Are they just taxis that drunk blondes and Instagram DJs trash back in Deutschland? Ja. Do American buyers give a fuck about the E-Wag's humble roots? Nein. Most E-Class Wagon buyers find the rest of the Mercedes lineup to be gauche and tacky, but remain loyal to the longroof. They also typically have the highest income of any Mercedes owner, so suck it, G63/S560/SL550/AMG GT. Plus, it's available as an E63, meaning you can drop off the kids at school one second and make Hellcats and Nissan Altimas fear for their lives the next.
The E-Class Wagon is a classic Hamptons workhorse. You could also replace Hamptons with Palm Beach, Petoskey, North Shore, Greenwich, Marin or any other affluent WASP area.
by henry1272838442 November 29, 2023
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BeReal

A new type of social media where at random, you're given two minutes each day to capture a BeReal and 'live in the moment.' No filters and stuff like followers doesn't matter. Most people's BeReals are of them doing boring everyday shit, which is kinda the point of the app.
Time to BeReal!

2 minutes left to capture a BeReal and show the world what you're up to!
by henry1272838442 November 11, 2022
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Mercedes-Benz S-Class

The Mercedes-Benz S-Class is iconic. It is the blueprint for all other luxury sedans, a technological tour de force, and has been the undisputed queen of the segment since it was officially introduced in the 1970s. What do Prince William, Jay-Z, Beyoncé, and Kim Jong-Un have in common? They've all been chauffeured around in the S-class at some point. S-classes can be found on nearly every street corner in cities like New York, Tokyo, Hong Kong and Paris, and they make up a good portion of the $100K+ market in the US along with other status-mobiles like the Land Rover Range Rover and Tesla Model S (ew.)

Everyone from businessmen to heads of state wants an S-class. Even with Rolls-Royce, Maserati, Bentley and Porsche making far more expensive sedans, the S is still taken seriously and wouldn't look out of place parked in front of a royal palace. Quite simply one of, if not the best cars ever made. Every car wishes it could be an S-class when it grows up.
I want nothing more than to listen to some Frank Sinatra in the back of a Mercedes-Benz S-Class in NYC right now.
When I landed in Paris, I was picked up in a Mercedes-Benz S-Class. Take that, peasant.
Diana has both a Range Rover and an S-Class. I love her.
by henry1272838442 September 23, 2022
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Lexus RX

The official car of Bay Area (especially) Tiger Moms since 1998. Lexus RXs can be seen shuttling little Asian kids to basketball practice, violin lessons, or SAT prep sessions from San Francisco to Silicon Valley. Yes, a lot of people say the RX is a white mom's car, and go to Marin County and you'll see why, but the RX, especially in California, is the Asian mom's car of choice. Bonus points if there are seat covers/plush headrests.
I went to take a practice SAT in San Jose and all the cars in the parking lot were Lexus RXs.
by henry1272838442 October 18, 2022
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Mercedes-Benz E-Class

The rich person's Camry. One of Mercedes' most popular models in the US, the E-class is one of the best selling European cars on the market. Everyone from doctors to lawyers has one, and it isn't uncommon to see at least fifteen or twenty in the parking lot of an upscale mall or restaurant. More often than not, they're leased by men having a midlife crisis, and accompany a Lexus RX in the garage. Bonus points if said E-class is parked in the middle of a mall around November/December with a big red bow on the roof.
Since Andrew's wife divorced him, he bought himself a Mercedes-Benz E-Class.
by henry1272838442 October 18, 2022
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