unicorn fart in the wind

noun

1. an undeveloped idea

2. an idea that is not grounded in reality

3. an ill conceived plan that has no chance of coming to fruition

4. something that does not exist in the real, or physical, world
Geezer: …so this “crypto currency”, as you call it, which doesn’t exist in any physical form, is going to revolutionize the way the world transacts business?
Millennial: Yes…exactly.
Geezer: That’s just a unicorn fart in the wind.
by goose_on_a_roof March 27, 2022
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flatusidal tendencies

a disorder whereby a person has recurring thoughts about breaking wind in crowded and, often times, confined places (This is a dangerous situation in which the person in question is on the verge of becoming a sphincter Sinatra if he/she does not receive professional help or, at the very least, a bitch slap by his/her friends.)
Paratrooper: Sarge, I know it’s not the time but I keep thinking about plantin’ some onion.
Jumpmaster: GOT DAMN IT!!! Ya better at-ease those flatusidal tendencies or I’ll toss your goat-smellin’ ass off this bird right now, green light or not.
by goose_on_a_roof October 16, 2020
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Waning Mullet

a man’s hairstyle that is bald on the top but with long stringy hair hanging over the collar in the back (elderhostel up front, party in the back)

This is a modification of the 80’s mullet. It is worn by the diehard that refuses to give up the long hair that he sported back in high school.
Bob: Did you see Jim Rickards on Fox Business talking about the demise of the US Dollar?
Dave: Is that the guy with the waning mullet?
Bob: Yeah, that’s him.
by goose_on_a_roof December 31, 2020
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Amuse-Bouche

A cute little girl to w’et your…err, um… appetite (derived from the French term of the same name meaning: a small appetizer as served, usually without a charge, in a restaurant)
"Dude, I know ya love those knee-shootin’ yabos but there’s such a thing as too big. Now take that little amuse-bouche. That quasar has got a nice set of perts."
by goose_on_a_roof October 09, 2020
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Squeeze Burger

An adorably cute dog (cat, person, etc.) that you have an irresistible urge to snuggle.
"Come here girl! Come on! That's it! Who's a good doggie? You are. Oh yes you are. You are so cute, you little squeeze burger."
by goose_on_a_roof October 28, 2020
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Head Sparkin’

Thinking (as in the firing of neurons)
Usage:
"I gotta squat for a jiffy wiz in The Gran Manzana and I've been head sparkin’ ‘bout pounding that Coney fillet in a twee fire-in-the-hole.
The dewclaws are up. Ya wanna draft my flivver?
Bang the pipes by 5:00 or hold peace.”

Translation:
"I’ve got a layover in New York City and was thinking about getting a hotdog in a quaint restaurant.
I’m enthusiastic. Do you want to come along?
Call me by 5:00 or it will be too late."
by goose_on_a_roof October 09, 2020
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snorked

past tense form of the verb “snork” which means to spit a jackfruit seed into a tuba from the balcony of the Metropolitan Opera (Needless to say, this term doesn’t see a whole lot of foot traffic.)

It was ‘96 when a crazy Aussie from Poowong North, Vic was challenged by his mates to spit a melon seed into a tuba from the balcony of the Metropolitan Opera on his upcoming junket to NYC. After practicing for weeks, spitting into a bucket from a eucalyptus tree, he asked for one allowance. The melon seed didn’t have sufficient heft to go the estimated distance. He was granted the use of a jackfruit seed. He then honed his skill until he had the precision of a sniper, “one shot, one kill”. On the night of the event, he and his wife (referee) took their seats nearest the stage on the third balcony. He sat through Giordano’s “Andrea Chenier” biding his time, waiting for just the right moment to do the deed and slink off into the night without being caught. The moment came at the very end of the performance when the audience cheered in appreciation for the talents of Pavarotti. He hurled that jackfruit seed with all the power he could generate from his manbag and then doubled over in a feigned hacking fit to disguise his action while his wife followed it to its intended target…and bingo! There have been no other “known” attempts. “Snorking” was never used until his triumphant return to Poowong North when one of his mates coined the term while fumbling through a toast in his honor.
Orchestra member: Say, Bob…I noticed that you missed that high note in the last stanza.
Bob: Yeah, I got snorked again.
by goose_on_a_roof October 13, 2022
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