garret's definitions

facial

(1)Application of make-up to one's face.
(2)Application of sperm to one's face.
Also see: smud

(1)"I'm going to Green's Salon to get my facial done."
(2)"Dude! Ron Jeremy just gave that bitch a facial!"

by Garret June 15, 2004

Pike

The action of just straight-up drilling a bitch in any orifice (most commonly vagina).

"Hey baby, wanna get piked?"
"Ho, don't even ask me to pike you; you know you can't take this dick."

by Garret August 28, 2004

AOL

A shitty internet service, which I like to refer to as "America Offline," because the shit crashes so much. Thank God I got Comcast. Oh, Tom Warner's a fucking faggot.

"I'm Tom Warner, and I'm a fucking faggot."

by Garret February 6, 2005

iron maiden

best metal band ever. best songs are flight of icarus and murders in the rue morgue.

dave murray is an amazing guitarist

by garret July 4, 2003

Weaksauce

Weaksauce(adj.) - A term used in place of "that is (lame/weak/gay/etc.)!"

(1)"Um...Honey, I think the condom broke."
"Weaksauce!"
(2)"Dude, you missed it! That fat chick just got punched in the face!"
"Weaksauce!"

by Garret June 14, 2004

Billboarding

When someone advertises something through clothing/bumper stickers/etc.

"You gonna buy that Chimaira t-shirt?"
"Nah, man. I'm not billboarding for a band I don't like that much."

by Garret February 7, 2005

smud

smud(n.) - The residual of one's ejaculatory fluids; usually in reference to one receiving a facial.

"Ah man, you got my smud all over your face!"
"You could probably see better if you wiped all that smud out of your eyes."

by Garret June 14, 2004